: About Me

Abusing the First Amendment since 1999. The Waldo News Network is an independent news satire website. We're writing for Helium because we feel every good pyramid scheme deserves a chance.

I know too much about ...

the fnords

My parents always told me ...

"But Bill O'Reilly says..."

My favorite memory ...

This one time, in Amsterdam...

Why I write ...

Because vodka and the Internet are a dangerous mix.

My inspiration ...

RAW, Hunter Thompson, Max Barry, Jon Stewart, Bill Hicks, Carlin...how many more cliche'd references do I need?

Politics, News & Issues > US Elections Does Barack Obama have ulterior motives in seeking the presidency?

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The blogosphere is abuzz with many theories about Barack Obama. In any other election cycle these could be easily played off as xenophobic and neophobic rants, but with our country at a crossroads, the question must be asked: What are Obama's motivations for seeking the Presidency? In order to answer this question, we would like to focus on two of the hot button issues facing American voters: climate change, and the role of race in voting patterns. While these two topics are seemingly independent, we believe there is a startling link between them. The climate change debate is certainly a h...

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