: About Me

       Well, i was born on the outer rings of Saturn approximately some moons ago. Soon after my birth i travelled through a worm hole tightly protected inside a satin stitched bamboo sack and found myself emerging beneath a granite city of few shrubs, football grounds, high rise flats, and newspaper laced streets.                                           
 
 I grew up with cats, dogs, budgies, and cockatiels for close friends and a pet Orange called Penelope, who i would drag around in my grandmother's garden in a drawstring bag. Later, Penelope's family extended to two foster children in the dinky form of satzuma's named Francis and Toby.                                            
 
My childhood to teenage years were ingrained from inside a dark cave where the other inhabitants would grunt or squeal in an attempt to communicate with each other. Needless to say, i am now one hot potato when it comes to understanding what people are really saying when they don't wish to communicate at all.                  
 
I like to write because, 1) i like my opinion to be heard without being audible (a talent i learnt from childhood - see above), 2) it allows me plenty of time to myself to decieve others into thinking i'm really anti-social, 3) All piss-taking aside, it enforces my belief just how important communication is to reach people, be it 1-to-1, or the masses. Without the aid of communication i think humanity would be starkly isolated; no way of getting ideas, dreams, plans, humour, emotion, etc across, would deem our evolution pretty pointless, to say the least!    

My passion is ...

Hanging around in my imagination and then getting an idea down on paper

I know too much about ...

The hypocrisy of politicians to ever give a toss about them!

My parents always told me ...

I want never gets.......

My childhood ambition ...

To be an artist or something equally creative

My favorite memory ...

Seeing a deer emerge from behind the trees in an evening forest, some years back

Why I write ...

Because it makes life more 3-D and its enjoyable

My first job ...

Helping my mum on her milk-round

My inspiration ...

The world around me and the people in it, Anyone who follows their own path and has an interesting story to tell

Creative Writing > Humor Humor: Bad days

12 of 52

BAD DAY AT THE OFFICE, DARLING? Bad days? Well, they just keep turning up, don't they? Like the proverbial pile of horse crap you step into when you feel like an imaginary moment in a lush green meadow as you get back to the oneness of the universe. Four weeks ago i took the brave and daring step to tell my supervisor to stick the job up into the penny slot of his boney arse. After 5 years stacking shelves for a living, i decided i'd lived enough of the dream, and i had to take a different route to financial success. Actually, when you find yourself in the frustrating position of working i...

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