It's no mystery that life is full of mysteries. There are things that happen that Plato, Einstein and even Alex Trebek could never explain. The mysteries we encounter make life interesting, unless they keep you awake at night. Then they're annoying.There are those among us who don't pay any mind to the unexplainable. Those pe... More..
There's No Cursing in BaseballLike a man winning an all-day shopping spree at the Mall of America, I was conflicted.Watching the Boston Red Sox sweep the inept and sleepy St. Louis Cardinals in the World Series in 2004 gave me a great sense of satisfaction; seeing Tony LaRussa with that goofy look in the dugout like someone j... More..
Write Strike; Wrong MessageTry not to be jealous of me, but I've never seen a full episode of "The Simpsons". I only saw 10 minutes of one episode of "The Sopranos", once. I also couldn't tell you the names of any of the characters on "24", "The X-Files" or "Heroes". I've simply never watched any of those shows, or dozens of ... More..
Carrot Top turned 41 on Monday, February 25. I'm sure that you just felt a myriad of emotions when you read that news. Some of you were shocked to see his name in print, for any reason. Ever. Some of you were surprised that he was that old.If Monday was your birthday, you were surprised to learn you share your birthday with a... More..
From what I can tell, hell didn't freeze over on New Year's Eve when the clock struck midnight and Illinois' greatest law ever introduced went into effect: the smoking ban.In fact, based on last week's warm spell, I'll take that as a sign that God approves, too. (Hey, do you really think that He has a box of Camels rolled up ... More..
I don't get text messages. I mean that literally and figuratively. As in, I don't receive any text messages, and I don't understand text messages.I don't receive any text messages because I don't own a cell phone. That's a simple enough explanation. Don't get me started on why I don't own one; that's another article for anoth... More..
It took me 28 years, but I finally found a practical use for my credit card. Last Saturday night I found myself in the high school parking lot with a dilemma. My car's windshield was covered in inch thick ice, and I had no scraper.It's just that I had figured that the longer I kept the scraper nice and warm in the garage, the... More..
I used to think that I was young. I even had proof of it: I felt young, I looked young, and I acted young. I knew all the songs on the radio and knew most of the characters on most of the sitcoms, and even a few cartoons. These were all sure signs that I was part of the "happening" generation. For a while there, most advertis... More..
Everyone has at least a few pets living with him or her, even if they don't actually own a cat, dog, gerbil, hamster, rabbit, or fish. (Reptiles do not count as real pets. The rule of thumb is this: if it can use its tongue to poison you, its tail to whip you, or its entire body to squeeze the life out of you, it really shoul... More..
No one ever said anything profound using profanity.That's one of the many lessons my father taught me in the 34 years that I knew him. Although I must admit that I ignored the lesson for the first 4 years while I grasped the English language. Then I ignored him again for another 7 years from age 13 through 19 while I grasped ... More..
Bob Rehak
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