: About Me

Dear You,

I'm not really active on this site any longer. However, Helium won't let me delete my articles or me, so this remains.

Tirz

My passion is ...

books and dogs

I know too much about ...

dogs

My parents always told me ...

to just shut up for a minute.

My childhood ambition ...

to be a vet.

My favorite memory ...

...still waiting.

Why I write ...

because I can't not write.

What I am reading/watching/listening to ...

to whatever I can find.

My first job ...

Video Store Clerk

My inspiration ...

Waking up

Creative Writing > Humor Humor: Marriage

19 of 41

Even Mother Nature keeps trying to tell humans not to get married but do we listen? No. If human marriage were like the animal world: Preying Mantis- Bride and Groom say their vows, they get busy, Bride gets knocked up, Bride bites off Groom's head and deposits her fertilized eggs in his warm corpse. Think of all the money saved on divorce lawyers. Plus, you'd never have to argue about silly stuff when he started to get on your nerves. Then again, I bet male vasectomies would be on the rise. Dogs-Bride and Groom get married, more or less. Then, while everyone is watching, Groom bangs Bride...

More..

Writing:

• Marketplace Approved Writer
• Helium Charter Member