: About Me

I am 29 years old and am mother to a beautiful little girl named Lucy. I live in Liverpool, England. I have 2 sisters, 1 older, 1 younger and 1 older brother, i also have 3 nieces and 2 nephews. I love all of them dearly.
I have seen a lot of heartache and trauma throughout my life however, there have been many great times too so i try to stay focused on them. I am ill at the moment and have a lot of social anxiety, i have been diagnosed with bipolar disorder and am still recovering from an armed robbery that happened in work so am unable to work with other people, i hope to change that as soon as i can. Much of my writing at the moment fits in well to the creative section, i also hope to write a book or two in the future but right now i am expressing my experiences in verse. Every word that i write is true to myself and my life and i hope one day to have a book of songs and rhymes published.
I have always wanted to live by my pen but am easily led and found myself following the advice of others. The last few years of my life have turned the tables and i am now determined to do things my way. I want to use the experiences that have affected me so negatively and turn them into positives to show others that you can handle whatever life throws at you and that it does make you a stronger, better person inside.
I was recently in therapy to help with postnatal depression, i developed this when i had my daughter and suffered horrendously. Strangely, the therapy did not help me in the way that i expected and instead of dealing with the PND i allowed myself to finally grieve the loss of my father, who committed suicide when i was fifteen years old. I had never allowed myself a single tear because i had been so focused on being 'the strong one' for my family.
I have slowed down my hundred mile an hour lifestyle now and am slowly working through my issues, writing is one of the best therapies that i have found and knowing that my words touch the hearts of others gives me an immense feeling of warmth.
I hope, when i am well enough, to qualify as a counsellor. I have been told by many people that i would be well suited to the job and it is something that is very close to my heart. I have plenty of life experiences to draw upon and know deep inside that i can do it.
I have spent my life helping others whenever i am able and hope to continue because helping others to live happier lives makes me smile.

My passion is ...

I have a few, Writing songs and poems and reading classic novels and poetry.

I know too much about ...

PostNatal Depression and suffering,

My parents always told me ...

i was the strong one and to fight for what i knew was right.

My childhood ambition ...

I wanted with all of my heart to be a vet. Funny how the turns on the road of life bring you to somewhere completely different...

My favorite memory ...

sitting on the banks of Loch Lomond in scotland, watching the sun go down over the mountains. The water looked like gold lapping up onto the shingle.

Why I write ...

I write because i know that it is something that i do well, i use it as therapy when i'm feeling low and as a way to express my happiness when times are good. I write for myself and for others, to share my experiences and to show others that they are not alone in their suffering. Mostly, i write because i have been blessed with the gift of words and i need to use it. I am not happy unless i am writing.

What I am reading/watching/listening to ...

I am watching The Tudors and America's Next Top Model, listening to Greenday and The Red Hot Chilli Peppers and am reading Edgar Allen Poe, Richard Laymon and Jane Austen.

My first job ...

I worked as an assistant in a boarding kennels and cattery whilst volunteering in a vets in the evenings.

My best moment ...

Giving birth to my daughter. this also unfortunately was, for a while the worst time of my life as i developed psychosis a few hours afterwards.

My inspiration ...

The strength that i see in the hearts of others, my daughters smile, the beauty of nature and the everlasting love that i feel for my family.

Creative Writing > Poetry Poetry: My pain

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LOOK AT ME! What do You see When you Look at me Is it My brown eyes Is it The smile That I save Just for you Is it My black hair That you wish Was longer Do you see My desires My wishes My dreams Do you see My hopes My fears My anxiety Do you know What keeps My heart beating Can you see Yourself Can you tell That sometimes I want to die Can you see My weariness My tiredness My despair Can you see The pain That resides Inside my heart Can you see The valleys On my cheeks Carved out By my tears Can you tell That sometimes I don't want To be me Do you know How it feels To be Empty inside Do y...

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