Articles written by Aleister Pinkbelly - Page 4

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About me - Aleister Pinkbelly

Besides the day job I work to pay the bills, I write for NewsMutiny.com amongst other things. email: davegreg@newsmutiny.com

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Computers & Technology > Internet Trends Satire: MySpace: 3 of 5
15 Year-Old Girl Wanted For Stalking Middle-Aged Men On MySpace.com A fifteen year-old California girl is being sought in connection with crimes she allegedly committed using the popular website MySpace.com, including several counts of sexual misconduct and fraud against at least seven middle-aged men residing in the Sacrame... More..
Politics, News & Issues > International Politics (Other) Satire: World Leaders: 3 of 5
UN Urges Myanmar Junta to Possibly Consider Stopping Killing Protesters - United Nations High Commissioner for Human Rights Louise Arbour stepped up the pressure on Myanmar today when she urged the nation's government to possibly consider stopping killing protesters and perhaps even introducing democratic reforms. Coming one... More..
Creative Writing > Satire Satire: War in Iraq: 7 of 11
Its Always Hard to See Your Child off on Their First Day of War (Sigh) It seems like just yesterday you were changing their diapers, teaching them to ride a bike, helping them with their long division... boy, they grow up so fast. You close your eyes and your baby's not a baby anymore - they re going to high school, having t... More..
Creative Writing > Humor Humor: Pets: 89 of 138
Pets Grow Old and Die - What's the Use? I've never been much of a people person. I don't like them and they don't like me, which is why I once thought pets might be a suitable alternative to human relationships. After all, a good pet won't nag you for spending the entire weekend on the couch drinking beer and watching sports... More..
Society & Lifestyle > Personal Morals & Values Humor: How to procrastinate like a pro: 6 of 9
How To Procrastinate - Tips For Putting Things Off Indefinitely Without Feeling Guilty - Create a list of what you're thinking needs to get done. Making tangible just how much effort you'll need to expend to accomplish everything will help clarify how disagreeable even beginning to try would be. Next, tear up the list you ma... More..
Local Guides > San Antonio Insider's guide to the real San Antonio: Riverwalk and the downtown area: 4 of 6
Like most major cities, San Antonio offers a vast array of things to do, places to see, and food to eat so much so that all of it can seem a bit overwhelming for earthly visitors burdened by the gastric limitations of a single stomach who are still bound by the traditional laws of space and time. The Riverwalk and downtown a... More..
Creative Writing > Reflections Reflections: Lost love: 49 of 73
My First Wife Didn't Cheat on Me - She Died of Cancer Don't get me wrong, I'm not particularly fond of the woman I'm currently married to or anything, but her cheating is starting to get on my nerves. As far as I'm concerned I could care less what she does when I'm not around, but the brazenness of her recent infidelity is n... More..
Creative Writing > Humor Humor: Parenting: 94 of 138
Tips For Turning Your Child Into A Dysfunctional Sissy - Predators may not be lurking around literally every corner, but instilling in your child an unhealthy fear of leaving the safe, familiar confines of their home or immediate neighborhood without parental supervision is an acceptable price to pay to insure your precious ... More..
Entertainment > Celebrities (Other) Lindsay Lohan's self-destructive ways: 15 of 22
News From Next Month - Lindsay Lohan Nabbed For Hit and Run, Teenage Victim Thrilled Los Angeles, CA - Less than 48 hours after being released from her latest stint in rehab, Hollywood starlet Lindsay Lohan was pulled dazed, drunk and confused from behind the wheel of a mangled Mercedes Benz SUV into the glaring light of the... More..
Creative Writing > Humor Humor: Food: 96 of 139
Wait Loss Tips For Jackasses Start an opiate habit. Opiates such as heroin, morphine, Oxycontin and Vicodin not only suppress the appetite, but can even help purge calories you've already consumed from your system in ample doses. Also, unlike speed, crank and other dangerous methamphetamines, opiates will leave you feeling w... More..