Articles written by Darren Walker

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About me - Darren Walker

Howdy! I am a big-shot attorney in Las Vegas. I hate my life. I like to tell stories. My big, fat Attorney Mentor once bellowed to me, "An attorney is nothing more than a storyteller!" I agree. Unfortunately, the storytellin' that attornies do is often for

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Politics, News & Issues > Sports News & Opinion (Other) Which is the slowest sport to watch: Baseball or golf?: 2 of 9

Certainly, golf is more boring when you consider that there are life-like cartoon terminator creatures that now inhabit baseball. Brace yourself for what follows. This happened while watching an Angels-Red Sox game. Tell me if baseball is borning, now! Kevin Youkilis' beard and mustache make humans frightened and angry. One ...
Sports & Recreation > Baseball (Other) The evil empire of baseball: The Yankees: 4 of 15

More Evil than the Evil Empire, The Red Sox Nation has produced a new brand of evil that surpasses Yankee evil and makes the Evil Empire look like a frightened, little fawn in the wilderness, lost, searching for its home, with only a soft red light to guide it through certain doom. I'll show you evil, Baby! Kevin Youkilis is...
Sports & Recreation > Baseball (Other) March to baseball playoffs hampered by unequal divisions: 6 of 10

Kevin Youkilis' beard and mustache make humans frightened and angry. One glance at this animated facial carpet incites any man to snap into a fit of rage at the sight of vile, eighteenth century facial hair, surrounding an over-sized blowhole, bellowing archaic curses at an umpire after a strikeout. Horror, tinged with confu...
Politics, News & Issues > Sports Archives Predictions: A look at which National League baseball teams will make the 2007 playoffs: 2 of 3

"The Angelic Baseball Oracle Prophesizes" It came to me last night like a vision, while chewing on strange leaves in my backyard: The Cubs and Angels will play in the Series. I already knew the Angels would win the Series, but their foe appeared to me in a vision. I tried to deny it. It disturbs me to my core. The Cubs ain't...
Politics, News & Issues > Sports Archives MLB predictions: Who will be the 2007 American League MVP?: 2 of 3

The fix is in, the Kevin Youkilis wins the MVP. More Evil than the Evil Empire, The Red Sox Nation has produced a new brand of evil that surpasses Yankee evil and makes the Evil Empire look like a frightened, little fawn in the wilderness, lost, searching for its home, with only a soft red light to guide it through certain d...