: About Me

Howdy! I am a big-shot attorney in Las Vegas. I hate my life. I like to tell stories. My big, fat Attorney Mentor once bellowed to me, "An attorney is nothing more than a storyteller!" I agree. Unfortunately, the storytellin' that attornies do is often for nefarious puposes.

It is not that I am a moral primadonna; it is simply that I have noticed that working in this profession corrodes my soul. Hell, I don't mind stealing your money, keeping your schitzophrenic brother out of prison or assisting your company in taking millions of dollars from your competition. It is kind of fun. However, the price my sanity pays is too high. Thus, I have determined that I shall write. I already write, better than most (my $100,000 education taught me one thing of value, at least) and, therefore I shall make this a career. It begins here.

My first "publication" is an article regarding how Kevin Youkilis, the first baseman for the Boston Red Sox, is, actually, Yukon Cornelius from the movie "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer." The idea came to me in a moment of pure, surrealistic inspiration. Thus, begins my writing "career."

Enjoy!

My passion is ...

my love, Paula, my children, writing and baseball

I know too much about ...

baseball

My parents always told me ...

you're lazy!

My childhood ambition ...

to play center for the Portland Trailblazers

My favorite memory ...

hitting a homerun in Little League, May 29 1979

Why I write ...

to touch minds, to make others laugh, to influence, to open my heart

What I am reading/watching/listening to ...

boring lawsuits, Hunter S. Thompson "Kingdom of Fear," Groove Armada's Compilation

My first job ...

Paperboy

My best moment ...

making love, graduation from law school, my children telling me they love me

My inspiration ...

my jackass, former best friend

Politics, News & Issues > Sports Archives Predictions: A look at which National League baseball teams will make the 2007 playoffs

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"The Angelic Baseball Oracle Prophesizes" It came to me last night like a vision, while chewing on strange leaves in my backyard: The Cubs and Angels will play in the Series. I already knew the Angels would win the Series, but their foe appeared to me in a vision. I tried to deny it. It disturbs me to my core. The Cubs ain't that good. I watched the last place Astros sweep them a short while ago. I tried to question my moment of pure, unfiltered inspiration. Yet, as I thought about it logically, my intuition was confirmed: who else is there in the National League, anyway? The Brewers are d...

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