Articles written by Mike Mulhern

What is Helium

About me - Mike Mulhern

Born and raised in the Boston area. Went to school at Boston College. Went to work in accounting. Found that accounting didn't agree with me so I went hiking. On the Appalachian Trail. For five months. Ow.

Decided to write about it, mostly just to let my

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Creative Writing > Memoirs Testimonials: Humorous stories from of job loss and unemployment: 2 of 71
When the clock in my car hit 8:00 I took a deep breath and got out. Funny place for a job interview. The guy said it was a home-based internet company, but somehow I wasn't expecting a real home. There was even a girl playing on the swings out back. This was my potential workplace?Ron met me at the door then took me down to h... More..
Politics, News & Issues > US Elections Archives US elections 2008 humor: John McCain's excellent list of fantasy vice presidents: 1 of 11
John McCain will have to make a big decision soon. Which political group he wants to pander to today. But another decision he'll make is his selection as a running mate. A candidate is looking for three things in a running mate. 1. Someone who will bring votes to the ticket. 2. Someone who has the ability to step in as presid... More..
Politics, News & Issues > Football Reflections on Bill Belichick and the New England Patriots video-taping scandal: 1 of 10
Ah, it's amazing how quickly things can change. In the blink of an eye Bill Belichick went from NFL icon to the most despised coach in history. From genius to evil genius. From arrogant, self-promoting egomaniac to... well ok, that part hasn't changed.And the "Spygate" outcry is all completely deserved, right? The public deno... More..
Politics, News & Issues > Basketball Who is your favorite basketball player in the NBA Hall of Fame?: 1 of 8
It was Boston in the 1980s. Cheers was the top show on TV, and a source of immense pride in the city. Governor Michael Dukakis was also a source of immense pride... until he ran for president. But what Boston was most proud of that decade was Larry Bird.Larry Legend owned that town. He was quite possibly the best forward to e... More..
Entertainment > Movie Reviews Movie reviews: Death Sentence (2007): 2 of 14
Looks like vigilantism is in vogue again. It's about time, gosh darn it. Now I can dust off my trusty .357 Magnum and roam the streets at night ready to dish out my own brand of justice on the evildoers of society. Or anyone I think might be an evildoer because they have a suspicious tattoo. Don't tell me they might be innoce... More..
Creative Writing > Humor Humor: Traveling mishaps: 5 of 33
Think the U.S. border with Mexico is wild and crazy? Take it from a veteran Canadian border crosser: try Canada one of these days. Armed guards running around, harsh French language, vicious crackdowns on Dr. Pepper smuggling. Oooh, the excitement! I don't even know why they pulled me aside when I crossed into Quebec last wee... More..
Arts & Humanities > French Language Humor: Learning French: 1 of 6
People often ask me what the most difficult thing is for an American living in Quebec. I don't even have to think about that one. I just stare off into the distance, fighting the nervous tic that's suddenly come into my eye and say quietly, "Buying a Dr. Pepper."In my first installment of the Dr. Pepper Chronicles your intrep... More..
Politics, News & Issues > Sports Archives 2008 NBA playoff predictions: What's in store for the Los Angeles Lakers?: 2 of 10
It's October 2007, and the NBA's regular season is about to begin. You're walking down the street minding your own business when a De Lorean screeches to a halt next to you, Doc Brown jumps out, grabs you by the shirt collar and splutters, "Mike!" (I'll just assume your name is Mike, since mine is.) "For the love of Einstein,... More..
Politics, News & Issues > Sports Archives 2008 NBA playoff predictions: What's in store for the San Antonio Spurs?: 1 of 5
What, did the NBA make a mistake when printing up their playoff schedule? They've got the Western Conference finals set for April. It's right here, Spurs-Suns beginning April 19th. Boy, you'd think they'd have gotten that kind of thing right. It also shows the Atlanta Hawks in the playoffs-jeez guys, ever hear of proofreading... More..
Entertainment > Movie Reviews Movie reviews: The Mist: 4 of 19
I love watching the breakdown of civilization.I'm writing this on a snowy day in Canada, having just returned from driving across town. Outside on the streets it's chaos. Cars are getting stuck in unplowed roads, skidding and sliding their way over the better ones; there are people digging furiously at the snow with ice scrap... More..