I was born, I live, and someday I shall die. It is all the times in between that seem to matter most. I am complex and simple. In general, I try to be the life of the party. I am a big kid at heart. I love to laugh and I have a demented sense of humor. I am very outspoken but silent when it matters the most. I love adventure and excitement. My actions are often random and spontaneous. I often have the tendency to ramble and I spend a lot of time getting lost just so that I can find myself again. Most people call me "insane" but I like that reference better than I would if they called me "normal." In my world- different is good!

Writing comes as natural to me as breathing does for many people. Words are always rolling around in my mind. I often find myself trapped inside my own warped views. I am a self-proclaimed creative genius. I am a thinker and a daydreamer. When I am writing, I am free. It is my sanity, my comfort, and my calm before the storm.

My comfort zones are relationships/family, parenting/pregnancy, and creative writing but I write all over the boards. I speak from experience in the hopes that someone will learn from my discoveries. I prefer to be diverse and I love to keep an open mind. My story unfolds within each new article.

The person wrapped around the writer in me is a simple one. I am as sweet as pie and as country as cornbread. I would be lost without southern hospitality and the countryside that I call home. I don't own a cell phone, the only blackberry I am familiar with is the kind I put in pies, and if an Ipod has nothing to do with peas or beans- I have no need for it. I am as old-fashioned as they come and I like it that way.

My work and life experiences have ranged from one end of the spectrum to the other. My mom once told me I could do anything I set my mind to and not only did I believe her, I also tested that theory. I have worked in nursing homes, convenience stores, and daycare centers. I have dug ditches, helped build houses, and filled out income taxes. I am always trying new things for fear of getting bored.

I have a variety of hobbies. I love to fish, 4-wheel, make crafts, take pictures, and chase dragons with plastic swords. I am a big fan of music but have little interest in television. I have been told I am an excellent cook and pride myself on constant almost obsessive housework. I love to learn new things and if I have a question about something, I don't keep it to myself.

I am a mother of a sweet but misunderstood special needs child. He consumes most of my time and captures my heart with his breathtaking smile. I have a dumb old dog and two silly little cats. They think the sun rises and sets in my eyes. Far be it for me to tell them otherwise.

I came to Helium on an insomniac night in October of 2006. I love it, I hate it, and I can't get enough of it. Helium has opened a world of opportunities for me. Until I came here, I had never been published. I feared rejection when it came to writing. Now days, I am living my dream of sharing my words. I have grown and changed so much as a writer and a person. The difference is like night and day.

The little green badge you see on your right doesn't mean I am a cop so there is no need to sweat. I am actually the match that watches over the dynamite in the Society and Lifestyle section. In simpler terms, I am the steward for Morals, Values, and Norms. What that means is I am here to help you. If you have questions, suggestions, or comments about that channel- don't hesitate to ask. If I don't have the information you are looking for, I will gladly stalk someone that does.

My passion is ...

life- without it, I wouldn't be able to smile, write, love, feel- or just be me!

I know too much about ...

typos! I sometimes get in a hurry or excited and click send a moment too soon!

My parents always told me ...

Think before you speak! (My mom still tells me that!)

My childhood ambition ...

I have wanted to be a writer since I knew how to write.

My favorite memory ...

is losing my shoes in a mosh pit at a Powerman 5000 concert. Those sweaty little boys were half my age but they still couldn't keep up!

Why I write ...

it is the air I breathe. It is the heart that beats within me. Writing is the passion that fuels my soul. It is my therapy..everybody keeps telling me I need therapy :)

What I am reading/watching/listening to ...

I love music. It is happy noise for my soul. I like anything loud and guttaral or mellow and inspiring.Favorites include: The Grateful Dead, Dr. Hook, Tool, Static-X, Godsmack, System of A Down, and Disturbed.

My first job ...

I babysat a lot as a child. My first tax paying job was at the local Skate Inn. At 17, it was the greatest job ever!

My best moment ...

was that fateful moment in 2007 when my son Izzy came back home to live with me.

My inspiration ...

people watching, life, thoughts, friends, family, and emotions.They all inspire me in one way or another!

Creative Writing > Humor Humor: Boys and body parts

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Generally, I am not the type of person who is easily embarrassed. Over the years, I have helped deliver babies, given enemas to elderly patients, and cleaned up a numerous amount of bodily functions that can only be described as disgusting. I can do this without so much as a scowl, blushing, or breaking a sweat.

Just when I thought I could master all of the sticky situations in life, my son came to live with me full time. He is a sweet innocent ten-year-old and the only person in the world that can turn my face from white to red in a matter of seconds. Being a mother is certainly interes...

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