: About Me

For me, humor is essential, it is the mainstay of my sanity, and the focus of my survival. It is therefore the obvious reason that my articles are humorous.

One of the perks of exisitng within "curmudgeon" status, is that whatever we write, whether people are entertained, enlightened, or even offended, it will have no actual effect on us. Why? Because we really don't need any approval. We haven't reached this point in our lives without enduring enough rhetoric to choke a horse. Our time now is not to try to make good impressions, it is to express ourselves and enjoy the process. And, I for one, am having one hell of a time!

My passion is ...

Spreading humor in the world ... much like fertilizer.

I know too much about ...

Sarcasm.

My parents always told me ...

"Honey, the way you dish it out, you better learn how to take it!"

My childhood ambition ...

To grow up.

My favorite memory ...

Laughing.

Why I write ...

I like it.

Creative Writing > Humor Humor: First dates

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First dates can be absolutely fine, in a perfect world, which we don’t live in. Good or even great first dates are easily forgotten, and don’t interest many people. Who wants to hear how wonderful things were? It’s the horrendous, jaw-dropping funny first dates that people want to hear about. I’ve had plenty of them and am not ashamed to share a few to give people a few laughs. Let me begin with the "Hot Tub" first date. He was a fairly prominent lawyer, well to do, and picked me up to go out to dinner. We weren’t in the car five minutes, when he announced tha...

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