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Creative Writing > Humor Humor: Mother

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Build me up, buttercup. Or don't.

The children get nervous when they are left alone with me in the house for too long, fearing they will starve to death. So I decide to cook dinner and free up their little brains to worry about other things, like scary monsters or bad men or polyester shirts.

I squirt olive oil on a slab of raw salmon and squeeze some lemon juice on top and slide the whole slimy mess into a Pyrex baking dish. I have no idea if one is actually supposed to put olive oil on a fish, but it makes it nice and shiny and the lemon seeds get stuck in the oil in a decorative pa...

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