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by Len Morse

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There are so many great movies, containing so many unforgettable lines, delivered by so many fantastic actors, that it's virtually impossible to whittle down those utterances to even a handful. However, history is replete with those who've attempted to give us their best lists, and I am certainly no exception. I will most likely be quoting from the same movies that my fellow reviewers have seen, but hopefully I'll also be able to introduce you to some other films or lines that perhaps you haven't yet enjoyed.

The following titles are shown in order of release date.

THE COURT JESTER (dir. Melvin Frank & Norman Panama, 1955): Through a series of misadventures, a jester is knighted and prepares for a joust, at the beginning of which is a ceremonial drink for the two combatants. A witch tries to help him out, and makes him memorize which drink she has poisoned. Lines spoken by Danny Kaye and Mildred Natwick.

Hubert Hawkins: The pellet with the poison's in the flagon with the dragon; the vessel with the pestle has the brew that is true.
Griselda: Just remember that.

RAIDERS OF THE LOST ARK (dir. Steven Spielberg, 1981): With his Egyptian friend, infamous archaeologist Indiana Jones peers down into the entrance of a previously undiscovered chamber at a dig site. Lines spoken by Harrison Ford and John Rhys-Davies.

Indiana Jones: Snakes. Why'd it have to be snakes?
Sallah: Asps. Very dangerous. You go first.

GHOSTBUSTERS (dir. Ivan Reitman, 1984): When confronted by an ancient deity, one of the heroes gives a truthful answer, causing them to almost get killed. Immediately after, one of his cohorts plants a suggestion. Line spoken by Ernie Hudson.

Winston Zeddmore: Ray, when someone asks you if you're a god, you say YES!

THE BREAKFAST CLUB (dir. John Hughes, 1985): Quintessential 80s movie about five kids in high school detention for the day. Line spoken by Judd Nelson.

John Bender: Hey, how come Andrew gets to get up? If he gets up, we'll all get up, it'll be anarchy!

CLUE: THE MOVIE (dir. Jonathan Lynn, 1985): Spoof of the famous murder mystery board game. Lines spoken by Christopher Lloyd and Eileen Brennan.

Professor Plum: What are you afraid of, a fate worse than death?
Mrs. Peacock: No, just death, isn't that enough?

BEETLEJUICE (dir. Tim Burton, 1988): Upon hearing that his friend has a haunted house and wants to turn it into a tourist attraction and paranormal research center, Max finishes their phone conversation. Line spoken by Robert Goulet (yeah, the singer).

Maxie Dean [hangs up phone]: Putz.

DEAD POETS SOCIETY (dir. Peter Weir, 1989): A professor inspires his students at a boys' school. Line spoken by Robin Williams. This movie really hit home with me.

John Keating: Carpe diem seize the day, boys. Make your lives extraordinary.

A FEW GOOD MEN (dir. Rob Reiner, 1992): During a murder investigation, a Navy lawyer questions a high-ranking Marine. There are many great courtroom scenes in this movie, but this is not one of them. Line spoken by the incomparable Jack Nicholson.

Col. Nathan Jessep: You wanna investigate me? Roll the dice and take your chances. I eat breakfast 300 yards from 4000 Cubans who are trained to kill me, so don't think for one second that you can come down here, flash a badge, and make me nervous.

SNEAKERS (dir. Phil Alden Robinson, 1992): Independent team of computer hackers negotiates with the N.S.A. over a powerful code-breaking computer chip. Knowing they have the advantage, each member of the team makes a request in exchange for the chip. Lines spoken by Amy Benedict, River Phoenix, and James Earl Jones.

NSA Agent Mary: Wait a sec. You can have anything you want, and you're asking for my phone number?
Carl Arbegast: Yes.
NSA Agent Mary: 273-9164. Area code 415.
Carl Arbegast: I'm Carl.
NSA Agent Mary: I'm Mary.
Bernard Abbott: I'm going to be sick.

DAVE (dir. Ivan Reitman, 1993): During an emergency, the Secret Service summons an Everyday Joe to stand in for the U.S. President. He soon gets the hang of it, but has a run-in with the Chief of Staff. Lines spoken by Frank Langella and Kevin Kline.

Bob Alexander: You're LINT! You're a FLEA! You're a BLIP!
Dave Kovic: Well...maybe I am. But you're fired.

THE ROCK (dir. Michael Bay, 1996): An ex-con and a chemist must stop a nerve gas attack from Alcatraz. Line spoken by Nicholas Cage.

Stanley Goodspeed: Uh, yeah, okay, that's about the most awful thing I've ever seen.

INDEPENDENCE DAY (dir. Roland Emmerich, 1996): Nasty aliens attack earth. We fight back. During an attempt to disable their mother ship, a member of our military wants to make sure the job is done before leaving. Lines spoken by Will Smith and Jeff Goldblum.

Capt. Steven Hiller: I ain't heard no fat lady!
David Levinson: Forget the fat lady. You're obsessed with fat lady. Drive us outta here!

OFFICE SPACE (dir. Mike Judge, 1999): Hilarious cult-classic about life in a cubicle farm. Line spoken by Ron Livingston.

Peter Gibbons: Human beings were not meant to sit in little cubicles staring at computer screens all day.

X-MEN (dir. Bryan Singer, 2000): Human mutations abound. Some use their "gifts" for good, others for not-so-good. This scene shows, however, that even the good guys don't always get along, when Cyclops suspects that Wolverine may be an impostor. Lines spoken by Hugh Jackman and James Marsden.

Wolverine: Hey, hey...it's me.
Cyclops: Prove it.
Wolverine: You're a dick.
Cyclops [pauses]: Okay.

PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN: THE CURSE OF THE BLACK PEARL (dir. Gore Verbinski, 2003): Extremely popular and profitable movie based on the Disney ride. These particular lines are exchanged as Will and Jack sword fight. Lines spoken by Orlando Bloom and Johnny Depp.

Will Turner: You cheated!
Capt. Jack Sparrow: Pirate.

MADAGASCAR (dir. Eric Darnell & Tom McGrath, 2005, Animated): Zoo animals born and raised in The Big Apple are mistakenly shipped to Africa. Near the beginning, the Penguins are trying to surreptitiously escape on their own. Line spoken by Tom McGrath.

Skipper Penguin: Just smile and wave, boys. Smile and wave.

Learn more about this author, Len Morse.

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