But anyways, I was totally chillaxing when my BFF came up to me and was like, "Oh em gee! My boyfriend totally just wants to be friends with benefits. Seriously, he must be trippin'! He used to be so chill." WTF, dear readers? IDK. I just.. DK.

If you need a translation, as well as a brain enema, you're not alone. The trend to think of spoken-aloud instant messaging abbreviations as "cute" is actually abhorrent. Has our culture gotten so lazy that we can't even say an entire phrase any more? In the case of the ever-popular "WTF," saying "Doubleyou tee eff" takes MORE syllables than the phrase it stands for.

"Friends with Benefits" means that, were Alanis Morisette my friend, thanks to that one line from "Head Over Feet" that is now ingrained in our youthful vernacular, I still think she would benefit from being punched in the face. Fun fact: I think most people who now use the phrase "friends with benefits" were probably in diapers when the phrase was forced into pop culture forever.

Any slang with the word "chill" needs to go. "Chill" as a replacement for "Cool" is the worst offender; "cool" can be either an adjective or a verb, where as the adjective form of "chill" is either "chilled" or "chilly." If the person is, in fact, actively dropping their body temperature, it's appropriate to say that they are "chilling." No matter how cool you may think people may be, they cannot in fact be CHILL, any more than they could "be go" or, I don't know, make people with poor grammar explode with the power of their minds.

Sorry, I digress.

Chillaxing is another word I hate; on the surface, it sounds like the pleasant sport of taking an axe to people who incorrectly use the word "chill," but unfortunately, such is not the case. The demon hybrid of "chilling" and "Relaxing," it gives one the mental image of super-chilling Hannibal Lecter on a beach in Maui.

I'm not sure what has happened to my beloved English language over the last decade; WTF, indeed.

Learn more about this author, Elizabeth Arnum.
Click here to send author comments or questions.

---

Add your voice

Know something about Today's most annoying popular catch phrases?
We want to hear your view. Write now!