THE BEST JOB EVER

No doubt about it: the best job I ever had was as engineer on the miniature railroad at our local Zoo.

Most of the ride operators were high schoolers, happy to wear a bright yellow tee shirt with the Zoo logo on it, to run the little boats or the rocket ride or the ferris wheel. Not me.

As soon as I knew I had the job, I went to a store in town that still carries the kind of items you used to see in the Sears or Woolworth's catalogues. It was there I acquired my striped coveralls, a matching cap and a big red bandanna. To my costume I added an over-sized pocket watch I'd kept from my theatre days and hung it across my chest on a big silver chain.

My philosophy was this: most kids today will never know what it's like to ride a passenger train as I did when I was young. The Santa Fe, The Super Chief, The B&O, The Zephyr...all are gone. The Zoo's scaled-down version was probably the closest thing to a passenger train they'd ever see. I intended to make it more than just a ride; I wanted it to be a railroading experience. I wasn't going to be a "ride operator;" I was going to be The Engineer.

My first couple of weeks were spent learning the controls and becoming familiar with the half-mile of roadbed that circled the petting animals' section of the Zoo. On Sunday mornings before the Zoo officially opened, I hauled out the broom, the hose and the brushes and gave the whole train a good scrubbing. While it dried, I checked the sandboxes, the oil levels, the fuel tank, the hydraulics and brakes, topping up fluids as needed or wiping down where a leak had occurred on the big drive wheels or idlers. All the brass got a polish.

Tucked away under the deck of an open-air snack shop through which the train passed when leaving the station, I located the rail gauge. It was a set of small wheels set for exactly the correct width of the rails. I walked the entire length of the railbed, pushing it ahead of me, and noting where the weight of the engine and its three cars had pushed the rails out of alignment. I also made note of any loose spikes or ties that needed replacement. All this I wrote on a report for the maintenance people to deal with. I was not a repairman...I was The Engineer.

I'd also bought a child-sized striped cap, a small version of my engineer's cap, and I kept it tucked away in the cab of the engine. After taking up the tickets and while people were getting seated in the open-air benches of the passenger cars, I'd grab

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