Friendship after motherhood is very hard, and anyone who is a parent understand this fully. To those of you who aren't parents, read this and consider what a mother goes through on a daily basis.

First you need to get up whenever your baby does so that the poor child can eat and have a clean diaper. Then you need to entertain the little darling for an hour or so until the baby either goes back to sleep or decides she's going to take one of those 10 minute naps. In between the baby being awake and her sleeping you need to clean the house, make the dinner, wash the bottles, make more milk, do the laundry, and bathe yourself. It's not an easy task, especially if it's your first time being a mom. Dad's have it rough too and often lose touch with their friends because of it. THIS DOES NOT HAVE TO HAPPEN.

My best friend just happens to be the god mother of my daughter. It works out really well this way because she is, and has always been, a huge part of my life and now she is an even bigger part of my daughter's. All be it we don't spend as much time together as we used to we still manage to get together, with AND without the baby.

I suggest making a day each week to spend with your friend. Even if you need to take the baby with you, more likely than not your friend will be happy just to be able to spend time with you, and if the baby's along for the ride that just means something to oogle at throughout the day.

Make it a point to call your friend or send an e-mail at least 2 to 3 times a week. This will tell your friend that hey, I'm busy but I'm still thinking about you. If your friend is a REAL friend then they will understand this and count this as a huge effort on your part.

Try double dating with your friend and their significant other (if they have one). If not, hey who knows maybe you can set them up with someone and do a double date so the whole blind date thing won't be as rough on them. :)

I also suggest to make it a point to not ALWAYS discuss what your baby has done lately. Sometimes you have those friends who are married and want to have a baby but are either having trouble getting pregnant or are just not ready at the point for the child to come. Talk about the baby if they bring it up first, this way you lose the uncomfortable factor. If you really truly know your friend then I'm sure you can find something else to talk about that doesn't involve how much little Timmy pooped yesterday or how many teeth little Sally has.

It's not difficult to keep friendships after a baby, it just takes more work...and if you're willing to work at it, your friends will definatly notice. And, if they don't, then they aren't worth having as friends in the first place.

Learn more about this author, Kim Mayers.
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