Many years ago I was invited to play mixed doubles tennis with some friends. As it turned out my partner was this tall, slim, very attractive man. I was instantly drawn to him and we hit it off right away. However, at the time he was dating someone else so nothing else developed. But still the attraction was there and we decided to hang out some, play tennis together, and to get to know each other.

Almost thirty years later I still count him as one of my dearest and best friends. As it turns out through our becoming friends we learned that despite the attraction we could not date each other. In fact, we learned that we loved each other so much as good friends that we didn't want to do anything to ruin a relationship that turned into a life long of caring.

Bad timing happened to be the best thing in that we each were either dating someone else or married to someone else when one or the other was unattached. Because of this we learned each others inner most workings and secrets. He knows my very darkest secrets and I know way more of his then his wife does. I know I can count on him to be there for me and he knows I have his back too.

By getting to know each other so well we learned that I was much too liberal for him. He was not ambitious or smart enough for me. I value a sharp mind and wit in a mate where he chose someone who was far more complacent. I would have eaten him for lunch if we were married. But as my friend I value that he takes things at a much calmer pace then I do. He paces himself and sets goals where I jump into things and charge along. We would drive each other crazy if we were a couple.

When he started dating his wife years ago she didn't like him having female friends. She was not overly self-confident and wanted him for herself. However, when it came time for her to say that we could not be friends he said all bets were off. She knew that where he went so did I. We are so close I count him as my official brother despite the fact that we are not really related. You can't choose your family but you can choose your friends and I decided that he was my brother in another life.

If we had dated I would have lost one of the best people I have ever known. I have had other relationships where I have stayed friends after I have dated the person however eventually those friendships have not lasted. The one that has lasted though that I have cherished the most is my relationship with my dear dear friend. Thank goodness we were wise enough to know we had something so special all those years ago.

Learn more about this author, Jane Johnson.
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