Poetry: Humorous 443 Articles

by Alina Wilson

A Tale of Two Crooks Once there were two crooked men, sneaky, lying thieves. Each had fleeced more suckers than a wild dog has fleas. They roamed near and far, committing every crime, larceny, blackmail, forgery...read more

by Roy Skillington

Cold Turkey The turkey must have realized the time was drawing near For pulling all his feathers out and shoving stuffing up his rear. The turkey did a runner just before that day came round We searched the farmyar...read more

by Rachel Newland

Today, I'm having an off day, And everything's gone wrong, My mum managed to humiliate me, By bursting into song, My dog has taken my slippers, And ripped them up to shreds, And worst of all my goldfish died, My cat...read more

by Ray Bardsley

RELIEF AND CONTEMPLATION, 4.07.02 You might like to change the last line of this poem... There are other words to rhyme, and they're in your mind! Tom Crapper created the Adamant Loo For the smallest room, in w...read more

by Kerry Michael Wood

Aged like my grandfather's wind-up Victrola, I love the scent of a fine Gorgonzola. Velveeta's cheap and tastes much cruder. Replace it with a wedge of Gouda. Cheddar's sharp, but eggs taste better Mixed with salt...read more

by Jill Blake

Fishing Today I went to catch a fish To put in momma's serving dish I put a worm upon my hook And settled back to read a book I waited and I watched my line While hoping soon to see a sign I played with s...read more

by Linda Barron

Woes of the Poet Naughty little nouns and verbs dance across my page refusing to allow me to compose a simple phrase They laugh when they look up at me and dash from side to side and just when I have need of them ...read more

by John Wiseley

Hey Sailor She said, "If you're looking for a real good time You show me yours and I'll show you mine If that gets you going and thinking of more There's a room with a bed, or right here on the floor" So we stripp...read more

by Teresa Brewer

Poetry? My spelling's bad. My grammars cursed. They say my metre well, it's the worst. But verse keeps running through my mind. It must be poetry. The words all rhyme. Some say correct it others say don't ...read more

by LaSal

Righteous Indignation Ouch! That dumb dog bit me! Oh, that dirty, rotten beast, Thinking he can take a chunk And on me have a feast. Well, of all the brazen nerve, That's what I have to day. The neighbors he...read more

by Mike Halleron

THE PINE TREE The Pine is a tree, so useful indeed, To full grown from sapling, to sapling from seed, It brought me much pleasure when I was a child, As in its tough bark my name became filed. But as I grew ol...read more

by Rick Case

HAVE A GOOD WEAK END We need a better work week, That by Friday aft, Doesn't find us weak, From our head to our very weak end. Comes our Monday, With sluggish grays, And groans of the mundane, It's enough t...read more

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by Amanda Heersche

Ode to Socks Too many times have I neglected you; Made you my puppet, Attacked you with glue. I've been, thick-skinned, tactless, clumsy, and callous. I abuse you, use you, and throw you away. What have you don...read more

by Criminy Crim

((( CHIPS ))) I stare at the big bags of chips, Knowing well they'll end up on my hips, But the salt and the season, Is more than good reason, To let them pass on through my lips. I look to the table of dips, Kn...read more

by Paul Morgan

Thong Song (Chanson du Thong) I sing you a song, the song of the thong that jewel of girly apparel: to all those who wear it and then grin and bare it I dedicate this little carol. Some call it a G-string, a ...read more

by Michael Hill

Jimmy's Campfire I see Jimmy 'round the campfire, He's cookin' up his brew Makes the best damn campfire coffee, That a cowboy ever knew Cold mornings around the campfire, After shakin' off the dew What a Cowboy ...read more

by Mailrangam Venkataraman

HUMOR STOPS TREMOR MAKING PERSONALITY CALMER Humor makes happiness favorable It makes living highly durable The worst anxiety is by it curable The greatest loss is made bearable When humorous words are delivered ...read more

by Nan Keltie

HEADS ARE GONNA ROLL I'd hardly left the grocery store and headed home that night, I was alone, the night was dark, the moon a hazy light. My mind was overactive, that much I will admit, I'm not a brave soul after ...read more

by Shona K

Sailor Sim Oh, there was once a sailor called Sim, Who thought himself a very clever fellow. He'd challenge all the men in the port, Until the sky the next morn had turned yellow. He made his money, In gambl...read more

by Tammy Attama

Running here, running there... "Hon, where's my underwear?" "Mom, I can't find my other sock!" What's it doing hanging from the clock! What's for breakfast? What's for lunch? Why don't we just have brunch? Two meal...read more