Tell me a funny joke (that's not dirty) 42 Articles

by Michael X

The girl asked her lover, "Darling, if we get engaged will you give me a ring?" "Sure, " replied her lover "What's your phone number?" - A man wanted to determine if both his wife and ...read more

by Mark Johnson

Two friends are walking through the woods hunting. Cooter trips and falls in a hole, then Billy Bob panics, since Cooter looks like he broke his neck. Billy Bob starts to hyperventilate, but pulls out his cell phone and ...read more

by Debra Herring

Surely everyone has experienced the frustration of being a patient in a hospital and not being able to get anyone to answer your questions. No one will tell you what the doctor's plans are for your treatment, and you're b...read more

by Mary Jones

there are three men waiting to get into hevean. The gate keeper says he only has room for one, so he tells them whoever died the worst death will get in. He calls up the first man and asks him how he died and the man says,...read more

by Michael Gruen

There are three pilots in the bar of Los Angeles International Airport talking about the seize of their planes. Russian Pilot: "We have built a plane in Moscow which is so big that it can take 10 football teams and...read more

by Pat Lunsford

A man came to a pool of water in the middle of a dirt road in the country. He stopped and was about to turn around but hesitated, wondering if he could get through it. "Excuse me!" he called out to the guy sitting on a tre...read more

by Trevor Billick

A blonde goes into work one morning crying her eyes out. Her boss, concerned about his employee's well being, asks sympathetically, "What's the matter?" The blonde replies, "Early this morn...read more

by Karon Brandt

"The 12 Days of Christmas" - The Revised Version December 14, 2006 Dearest John: I went to the door today and the postman delivered a partridge in a pear tree. What a delightful gift! I couldn't have been more s...read more

by Dolores Moore

Telling jokes is definitely not my forte. I find myself giggling helplessly, being unable to go on, gasping and stammering, till my audience loses patience and drifts off for another drink or a plate of cake. Often, I ...read more

by Sweetsmile

Here is one from me. It is about a babysitter, who is now in prison. The babysitter told police what happened to her that day, and why she killed the man and lady by mistake. She said that last Sunday, when she was cleanin...read more

by James Jones

Two guys are drinking together, when one of them throws up all over himself. "Christ!" he says, "My wife ish going to kill me." His friend puts his arm around his shoulder and offers him 20 dollars. &...read more

by Shandra Lorne

A nun hailed a cab one day, and while she and the cab driver were traveling, the cabbie kept looking back at her through the mirror. "What is it?" she finally asked. The cabbie blushed. "You're gonna think this is ...read more

by designtarantula

A large audience is attending a live taping of a popular talk show on the topic of "Paranormal Experiences." The host invites a group to the stage and asks them to divide into three groups. The first group for...read more

by Nancy Jennings

Statistics show that men generally make the larger sacrifice of their respective gender characteristics when they get married. Men give up doing their cleaning, their cooking, their grocery shopping and their laundry. ...read more

by Michael Mata

When I first Discovered Love I remember it like if it was yesterday. When I was about fourteen years old my brother and I were walking through an open field, which was two miles pasted our house. As we kept walking, I...read more

by Daniele Martini

486: The average IQ needed to understand a PC. State-of-the-art: Any computer you can't afford. Obsolete: Any computer you own. Microsecond: The time it takes for your state-of-the-art computer to become obsolete...read more

by Sweet Stuff

1.A man in a village is travelling by train.After eating the food served,he sarts feeling uneasy and soon needs to go to the toilet urgently.HE enters and finds that there is no commode.He panicks and runs to his bogie/com...read more

by Londie Rene

Once I told my child to tell me a joke that's not dirty or bad. He replied, "I took a bath". _ Parent: Tell me a dirty joke. My kid: The white horse fell in the mud. _ A man died and was taken to...read more

by William Bond

There is nothing more important to your life, both your mental and physical life than telling or hearing a good clean joke, at home, work, or at the coffee shop. I just got back from the coffee shop, met a friend and told...read more

by Smarty Pants

A blonde finds herself in serious trouble. Her business has gone bust and she's in dire financial straits. She's so desperate that she decides to ask God for help. She begins to pray. "God, please help me. I've los...read more