As Lois prepared for her date with Amy, she wondered if she could be the one. Amy had approached her at a party and seemed forthright, funny and fabulous. (It didn't hurt that she was also really cute.) But Lois was now a bit nervous as she tried to remember all of the things her friends had told her. As the words of many a well-wisher jumbled about in her brain, Lois had the brilliant idea to jot them down in order to create a tangible visual representation and empty her over-worked mind. Here is that list.

1) PLAN A DATE WHERE CONVERSATION CAN HAPPEN. Going to movie or a play can be great, but it doesn't give you much time for chitchat (unless you're one of those who likes to converse during a film in which case you immediately will get the boot.) Great first date spots are coffee houses, dinner (or lunch if you are a lesbian on the go) or even going to a bookstore where you can talk about everything from interior design to lesbian pulp fiction. If you get to choose the location, go someplace you're quite familiar with. (You will feel more comfortable and in control of the situation.)

2) BE AT LEAST FIVE MINUTES EARLY FOR YOUR DATE. Nothing makes a better impression than being at your date destination early. If you're having cocktails, take the initiative to order a drink for her in advance (this can be tricky if she likes Rolling Rock and you order a Manhattan, so only do this if you happen to know what she likes to drink.) Another perk to arriving early is that you can scout the location where you want to sit and are in control of how close you want to be. (In a coffeehouse there are often couches that are perfect for first dates as they are the right size for two.)

3) PERFECT THE ART OF ASKING QUESTIONS AND LISTENING TO THE ANSWERS. Great conversationalists usually don't talk about themselves as much as they ask questions and listen. Think of yourself as a talk show host interviewing a guest. Have fun asking great questions and putting your "guest" at ease. You'll find that your date will want to talk and open up. (It should be noted that for there be to a conversational "spark", the other girl should be doing the same thing. If she insists on only talking about herself and doesn't inquire into your life, then she might be a bit self-centered.) Listening really means taking time to hear what they are saying and not just waiting for your turn to talk. Before you respond to what they have said, mentally review the last few words

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