Tying a necktie is one of those disappearing social skills that are necessary to achieving a polished look and so important to create a good impression. Unfortunately there seems to a dumbing down' of social etiquette and casual manners and dress are the accepted style. In the last few years I've seen less ties more jeans and T-shirts or casual pants and button downs or polo shirts, especially in the workplace. I know most males say that ties are comfortable, but I think they are secretly intimidated by the tying of a tie and were never taught how to do it correctly. Using a clip on is just not as classy and seems a little "low-class", even for a teenager. Even they want the real thing or nothing at all.

When I was growing up in the 80's it was fashionable for girls to wear ties and skinny ties were the hip thing for guys or gals. TV shows like Different Strokes' and Facts of Life' showed pretty girls with ties and skirts and rock stars, like Pat Benatar made it cool to be a girl and wear them. I always thought if worn right, it was a bit classy too.

During that time, my grandfather gave me one of his ties and also taught me how to tie it correctly. Not only was this skill handy for me, but being raised by a single mother of four, I taught my younger brother how to tie a tie. For me, tying a tie is not only a warm memory of my grandfather, but something I've been able to pass on to several others, including my son. I also find it amusing that I am a woman that has mastered this skill.

To begin, put the tie around your neck with the seam facing down. There are two different ends of a tie; a large end and a smaller end. Bring the small end to about half the length of the larger end as it hangs down in front of you. Using just the thumbs and index fingers, hold the small end with the left hand and the right hand holds the larger and longer side at the same level, cross them, putting the larger end over the smaller end. Now let go with your right hand and raise the smaller end so that it is straight out in front of you and the large end is just lying on top. With your right hand, reach under the small end, grasp the larger end and pull it so it hangs loosely between your arm and the small end. Now move the left hand up the tie until it is just below where both sides cross and hold the tie there, with just the thumb. With your right hand, reach under the small end pull it around and over the small end and let it hang over your left hand. Remember to keep the seam facing down on both ends.

Now with the right hand, hold the larger and longer end and bring it up through the loop around your neck and down through the loop created around your left hand. Slowly pull on the larger end, making sure the seam is down and begin tightening the loop as you remove your left hand. Now you should have a loosely tied tie. In order to shorten it to the length desired, just hold the smaller end with your left hand, keep the knot in place with the right hand and pull down with your left hand. This will tighten and adjust the tie to the right length. When it is sufficiently snug, adjust the knot so it looks like an upside down triangle with the large and longer end hanging directly on top of the shorter small end. For the proper length of a tie, the longer and larger end should be just above the belt buckle by and inch or two.

Don't you look grand!

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