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We all carry little pieces of each of our ex-lovers within us. They appear in the form of a little memory that springs at us out of nowhere as we go about our day to day activities, or in an emotion that creeps in that is reminiscent of past emotional experiences. They can be in a warm thought that crosses our mind or in a memory that causes a tear in our eyes. The people that we have loved will always be a part of who we have now become and for that reason some aspects of them will always be with us. We may even search for these same characteristics in our future lovers.

I always said that if I could take one aspect of each of my past lovers, and combine all those aspects together, then I would have my perfect mate. There always seem to be some characteristic of my ex-loves that drew them to me and that made our relationship enjoyable.

From one it was his curiosity and ability to sit and talk for hours about anything and nothing. We could spend hours discussing life and the many curiosities of it that make life worth living it. We could sit over coffee and talk, or under the stars discussing the many glowing embers in the sky, or just lie in bed at night and softly whisper in the dark to each other.

From another ex-love I remember how we danced together and how great was his love of dancing. He and I had spent countless hours gliding across a hundred dance floors with each other. We had never taken lessons but our bodies grew accustomed to the other's steps till we molded to each other, each of us knowing the other's move before it occurred, in perfect step. We danced with our eyes locked on each other and the rest of the world disappeared till there was only he and I on the floor. We danced in the evening, we danced in the morning, and we danced in the afternoon. It never mattered where we danced because we only danced for each other; I would love to have that feeling again, for I have not found it since.

From the man that I truly loved, I would want to always have his touch, it was warm and comforting and I miss it very much. His hand could always be found in mine, his arms often around me, and his lips always searching for just one more reassuring kiss. Some people think that being too touchy is 'Clingy', but it is not, it is wonderful to have someone desire your touch that much.

There are a lot more aspects of my perfect lover that I could share but I won't. Suffice to say that my perfect lover does not exist except in the many little memories that I carry

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