or judging ourselves. Admit it, mums judge other mums. Mothers who work look down on mothers who don't and vice versa. We are judged for not breastfeeding longer, not opting for natural birth, not putting our child in daycare, not succeeding in toilet training, for not regaining our pre-pregnancy figures, for not yet having another baby the list goes on. Experts say that we need to appreciate that every parent has their own struggles and we all have different ways of raising our children. We may not agree with what other parents are doing, but when they do what's true to their hearts, that's good parenting. Everyone has an opinion on what's right and wrong, but as long as we're giving it our best, it should be fine. I feel that parents, and especially mothers, should support and encourage each other to do the best that we can.
So okay, we are judged by others, but we also judge ourselves. We do this both consciously and subconsciously. Take for example the fact that we are constantly being fed glossy images of celebrity mums. Their taut tummies and sexy, svelte figures are draped in the latest fashions. They tote their prodigal children across the globe, delightfully changing diapers, making organic food and appearing on Oprah. They exclaim delight at the joys of motherhood, barely able to wait it seems, to have more. All this while filming million dollar movies or selling million dollar records, launching fashion or perfume labels and championing charitable causes. Phew!
We compare ourselves to them and think that to be good mums, we have to be perfect'. What we don't see is the army of nannies, personal assistants, trainers and dietitians at a celebrity's disposal. Oh, and let's not forget the psychologists, spiritual gurus and cosmetic surgeons on speed dial, as well as the oodles and oodles of money. Then, there's also Photoshop, the magic tool that erases wrinkles, cellulite, stretch marks and other imperfections. We're presented with images of utter perfection that are beyond most of us. It is hard to separate reality and fantasy when you're feeling bad about yourself.
So what are frazzled mothers to do? I say, give ourselves a break. Let's not beat ourselves up over our perceived imperfections and failures. Certainly, we want to excel, both at work and on the home front. We want to make sure our families are served delicious, nutritious home-cooked meals. We want our children to be both physically healthy and emotionally fulfilled. But, we should accept
Below are the top articles rated and ranked by Helium members on:
by Selina J
When you are pregnant, you have visions of being the greatest mother on the planet. By the time your child reaches the age
Is good mothering a myth? Some say yes and others say no, and to complicate things even more, we all have our own notion
Good mothers are certainly not a myth. There are plenty of them out there. I have one, know some, and I have recently been
by Silva Payne
There is an archetypal woman who is a cross between Mary Poppins and Martha Stewart. She has a perfect home, perfect children
by Heide Fitch
What To Expect When You Have No Expectations:
I vividly remember the day I realized I was an unfit mother. It was about a
View All Articles on:
The myth of the good mother
Add your voice
Know something about The myth of the good mother?
We want to hear your view.
Write now!
Featured Partner
Arts for All Ages is a non-profit organization that travels to schools, extended-day programs, daycare's, homeless sh...more
hide