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or otherwise moving far away, all I could think of was the dream I was refusing to give up.

Ever since we found our new church home, I've been holding onto the dream of starting a bell choir, something that I've been encouraged to do but have found roadblocks along the way. Still, with enough Will power (mine or God's, it didn't matter to me) I could accomplish this goal and give all the glory to Him. It was definitely in the category of "all the things that charm me most" as in the hymn we sang this morning, and I was told to lay it down.

Could it be? Could it be that I would be asked to lay down a God-given talent used for 20 years already to bring Him glory? It goes against everything I've ever thought about gifts. We are supposed to use them, right? I was very clearly told, "yes, but not right now". The pastor went on to say that sacrifice hurts, but brings joy as we follow God's plan for our lives. I was hurting; my family still plays bells and sings together at our old church. But I am also joyful; I am in the church body where God led us to serve. I was just confused that He would have another vehicle of service for me than singing or playing bells.

After we sang the closing hymn, the pastor encouraged us to come kneel at the steps or simply raise a hand if we wanted him to pray for us. I pictured the bell cases being brought up to the front as a sacrifice. I could not hold back my tears. I raised my hand. On the way up the aisle after the service, I handed the cassette tape to my old friend and told her that I was hurting. She said she would pray for me and we must've hugged at least 3 times. I was sobbing. She knows my history. The act of giving her the tape symbolized my giving up the "right" to sing.

David grew up in Bethlehem, but understood it was not his home anymore and he poured out the water as a drink offering. My history was in God's hands 20 years ago and it brought Him glory. It is now in His hands once again as I've finally given it up to Him. I pray it brings Him glory that I have been completely poured out and will make myself available to serve in the ways He provides from here forward.

Learn more about this author, Marcy Yarbrough.
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