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When we were best friends one moment but yet, by the fall of the next leaf, we have become complete strangers.

Isn't it funny how life revolves around fate? If you're meant to have it, it will come to you eventually. If it isn't meant to be yours, no matter how hard you strive for it or how hard you hold on, you'll lose your grip in the end and it will leave you eventually. How much all of us yearn to be able to exert control over these magical realms where this strange unknown called Fate determines our...well, fate.

No matter how beautifully you started out there is always the possibility of it ending in tears. Or it can work the other way round- despite how rough the starting was, the ending becomes a perfect tale. We are all setting our targets too high and striving so hard for perfection that when reality hits, it hits us hard.

I have always believed in forever. I thought you and I, and me and you, we could be best friends forever. But if there is anything Life has taught me, it is that people come and go. The truest ones are the ones who will stay by you throughout the years. These are the friends whom you don't have to spend much time with but can easily return back to the same place where you last ended off at. The ones where friendship seems effortless not because you do not put in effort, but because it has become a part of you that you no longer notice what you have been contributing all this while is the effort to sustain your friendship. What happened to ours?

You may be all popular with everyone else around in school. With random people whose faces you don't even recognise waving a hello to you when they pass you in the school corridors, or having to say hi to the next person you see around the corner. You hear your name almost everywhere you go. Yet, popularity is but a facade for the loneliest of souls. The more popular you are, the more alone you realise you really are. When you are happy the world seems to sing with you, but when you are down and out who are the ones you know you can trust to be there?

After four years I have still ended up back at the same place where I've started from. No wonder they say it's the circle of life. No matter how many revolutions you make you eventually find yourself back at your initial starting point. When you run so hard towards your next destination in order to move on but in the end find out all you've been doing all this while was jogging on the same spot.

Birthdays are supposed to be happy occasions. Well, maybe they are, but every year on your birthday I find myself more alone than ever. On this day I always take a second shot at chance and cross my fingers hoping a miracle will happen to turn back time and bring our friendship back to where it used to be. But that miracle never comes. Four years (and counting) and I am still here waiting. I hate how you mean the world to me but to you, I am almost nothing. I used to think that being forgotten was the worst thing that could happen to anyone, but I have come to realise that the most heartbreaking of all is not being forgotten. Rather, it is when you remember me, remember my name and face, but you no longer remember the times we spent together or the bonds we used to share.

I know that I should get on with my life, but a life lived without you could never be right. Every time something happens I pick up my phone and dial your number...only to realise halfway that you're no longer the same person on the other end of the line. You are there, but you are not there. The you of yesteryear has disappeared into my past and that's all you'll be- a fragment of my past.

The thing is- your shadow continues to haunt me.

Learn more about this author, Fiona Cher.
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