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I am no stranger to medical issues. For years I worked on Oncology/Hematology in-patient units. I knew the jargon and the medical and surgical options.

I have had Chronic Fatigue Syndrome for 12 years. CFS crosses all body systems so I knew my body pretty well. I was used to overwhelming exhaustion and widespread body pain.

I had lumpy breasts for years. The first few times I felt a lump I was terrified. I had seen the faces of breast cancer and I knew what lay ahead of me. My relief when it turned out to be a cyst was as overwhelming as my fear had been.

For the next five or six years after my annual mammogram, I routinely had an ultrasound with another to follow in six months. Every six months I saw cysts big ones, small ones even clusters of cysts. When I was officially post-menopausal, the cysts vanished. Hurrah!

In November of 2007 I went as I did every year to have my annual mammogram. The next day I received a phone call. They had seen "something" on the mammogram and wanted to do another mammogram that had more magnification. Sure, I can squeeze in one more doctor appointment and oh yes, please squeeze my right boob as flat as flat can be.

They tried and tried and repositioned my breast and me and squeezed it as flat as they could but the "something" remained elusive. I was sent to the ultrasound department. They gave it all they had but "it" was in an awkward position. Of course it was, I've always been a bit awkward.

I was scheduled for a biopsy the end of that week. I've had biopsies and they're no picnic but they aren't the worst test either. I arrived for my biopsy and changed into a lovely hospital gown. I was taken to the room where I would have my biopsy. When I walked in I stopped, stared, and burst in to giggles. There was a table much like an ordinary x-ray table but modified slightly. It had boob holes in it.

I lay down on my stomach and had yet another type of mammogram. It felt like one of those prize machines you see in arcades that have a crane with jaws on the end. You lower the jaws over what you want, open them and then close them over a tiny corner of something.

In the case of this mammogram, the crane/jaw thing came up from beneath me and was deadly accurate in grabbing my entire breast in its jaw. It didn't hurt and the picture in my mind kept me giggling. The people doing the tests said they never had anyone who giggled through the whole procedure.

My elusive "something" was still in hiding so another ultra-sound was done. Nope, still

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