by Elizabeth Bridgette

Created on: April 08, 2008

Your eyes lock. There is a sudden heat and in that moment, your heart giddily leaps. Your cheeks redden and you blush with excitement, panic and shame. You are committed and don't want to feel this way and have absolutely no business acting on it. And yet...

From the second I saw him, I knew there was something special. As we walked together, hands extended toward a shake, there was a click and a recognition. But it was something we could not place, and we had never met before. Uh oh.

I try to resist "walking down dark alleys" as I like to refer to them. They are the temptation that is placed in front of me that I know I'm close to giving into should the ability arise.

Nonetheless, here he was in all his glory, and there I was with no makeup on, dressed in dungarees and a sweatshirt. It didn't matter. We saw each other. And we had to spend four days together in constant company. I tried so hard to keep every look professional, every gesture.

I can honestly say that during that long weekend, despite some mild flirtatious comments, there was nothing that anyone could fault us for. And yet we knew. So when I invited him to come back in a few months, he jumped at the opportunity. I knew why he was coming back, in spite of the facade, which was truly to get work done. He was coming to see me. To see if what we thought was there was real.

At the airport, when I picked him up, we had a quick embrace. Electric, scary, it could not happen again. Dark, dark alley. One I'd been down before, but never since I'd been married. We had to get some work done before seeing everyone else, and as we sat in front of the computer, the room getting darker and darker with the setting sun, his knee accidentally brushed mine. I thought I would explode. For the first time, I actually believed in Tantric sex!

Nothing happened the whole weekend and everything happened too. We spent many hours together, the storm of emotion building, until after the seminar was over, and I should have taken him back to his hotel, but instead we went downtown along the lake. Neither one of us wanted to speak of the chill in the air. We were taking in the beauty of the setting and of getting to know someone who we felt a soulful connection to. We laughed like children, cried over hardships in our lives and told each other secrets no one else knew.

We touched only three times on that trip. I held his hand to emphasize a point once for a moment, and he pressed both of my hands with his in a gesture so emotion filled,

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