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Things I don't understand about relationships

Lately I have been doing a lot of thinking about a certain subject - - love. Yes, that four letter word that is said too much, but at the same time, not enough.

A wise friend once told me that in order to truly be "in love," one would have to become unselfish. However, what with all the dysfunction in relationships today, how can one really afford to be unselfish? Now, I can't speak for everyone's romantic endeavors here, but from personal experience, I have found that truly letting go and giving yourself over to someone completely usually results in heartache and possible debt. I mean, shouldn't there be a certain amount of selfishness in both parties? Especially when you're likely combining two people with two very different lives and two very different ambitions? No one can really be happy when they are constantly sacrificing for their lover. So, how does it work?

I have also been struggling with the question of "how many times can you fall in love?" I mean, is there a limit? A point when you start to realize that you've said "I love you" to every single person you've dated and yet, are still alone? And if you say it and it doesn't work out, does that mean you were never in love or too selfish to be in love? How do you know when it's truly love? So far, I have come to the conclusion that it's possibly when you realize that you wouldn't mind being selfless if your lifestyle allowed it.

So why have relationships become so difficult to obtain and even harder to sustain? Here's my take. Love is probably one of the most fulfilling human emotions. Now, I am saying this as I am under the impression that I have been in love. But, who knows really. It aggravates me to no end that people nowadays have this "fairytale" impression about love. Like, Prince Charming is going to come along on his faithful steed and life will be lived happily ever after. NOT! It is because of this horribly skewed ideal, that many people simply give up when the going gets tough. By that I mean, people have this complex that they can simply walk away from a relationship that requires any effort because something simpler will come along. Love is not easy people it's supposed to be complicated. Isn't life more worthwhile with some obstacles? As I said, love involves two people becoming one. How can that be simple? The true illustration of love has gotten lost in Disney somewhere and it's really sad, because people are missing out by giving up.

What amuses me most is that people


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