by Therese Daniels

Created on: April 04, 2008   Last Updated: May 06, 2008

Has your relationship gotten so comfortable it has lost its fire?

An intimate relationship is an agreement between two people who love each other to live together because their lives are richer and better living together than separately or with some one else. When relationships begin on that basis, they usually last a very long time. However, a long term good relationship can become so comfortable it is boring. The thought of separation is unthinkable because there is too much love and basically too much invested. If you are in a stable, loving, but at this time boring relationship it may simply need some newness introduced to rekindle the fun and sparkle. What it may need is some spice, wow, ratatatat, glitter, surprise, and whatever to wake it up! Think about these ideas and see if any of them are worth doing?

The reality is everything in life-the job, the house, the hobby, friends, and even romance-gets old and tired unless we continually introduce newness into our activities. That is especially true in personal relationships. All it takes is one partner to inspire the other. So if you feel your relationship has reached the stage it needs to be reawakened, start with personal inventory of yourself. Then check your partner, and yourselves as a couple. List what you do,what you have have done, what you want to do as an individual and as a couple. List what you feel are strengths and weaknesses in yourselves as individuals and as a couple. Armed with that information, plan what it would take to make the differences to bring back the sparkle, fun and freshness in your lives as individuals and as a couple.

Always start with self improvement first. Never tell your partner what you think he/she needs to do. Take responsibility for your own happiness. Do you need a make over? Do you need to lose weight or get a new hair do? If so, begin immediately. Your partner will take the lead and may join you.

If you are not personally happy, ask yourself what you need to do independent of your partner to become more personally happy. Start doing it now. As you become happier, your happiness will up lift your partner. That happiness will reflect into the daily quality of the relationship.

Life is about participation, challenge, and sharing. The more a person does and shares the more interesting life is. Get involved in something uniquely you, and become so interested in that, you become very interesting. Your partner will become fascinated and get interested, too.

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