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The intention of becoming an English teacher is worlds apart from actually being an English teacher. Behind the scenes, where 75% of the work takes place, that's what really determines the quality of a teacher's work. Who knew? As a junior in high school - or even as a college student - I certainly did not.

My first love was Ramona; later, it was Laura Ingalls, Judy Blume, Stephen King. Books, characters, authors - these were the things I loved, and I wanted nothing more than to be a part of this world called literature. Of course, I majored in English in college and then planned on attending graduate school as a creative writing major. But I froze. What if I couldn't make any money as a writer? I was already poor, and with mounting tuition, I was growing poorer. I had considered teaching on the college level but decided against it in favor of the writing major. In the face of this fear of failure, I considered teaching English on the high school level. It turns out, teaching high school was what I was always supposed to do. I just didn't know it, and even after I had my first job, it took me some time and a lot of work on my self-confidence to realize that I was exactly where I was meant to be.

In my experience, learning about teaching in college is completely unrealistic. I learned theories and practiced speaking in front of groups, but I learned practically nothing about the things I use everyday. There is the endless paperwork of essays, tests, reports, report cards and planning, planning, planning. There is also the Fear Factor - I had some unexpected stage fright at the beginning of my career as I stood in front of twenty-eight teenagers and tried to act as if I weren't about to faint from nervousness (and I thought that graduate school would be scary!). Luckily, I've overcome the stage fright, but everyday, the show must go on.

In the classroom, in dealing with my students, who are young men and women, I just use courtesy, compassion and common sense. I hold my temper, try to be fair,withhold judgment and maintain order. I know my material because I have been teaching for eight years now and because I am smart, but the tricky part is getting my students to know the material: that's where the planning comes in, and that's where time is spent.

Trial and error, tweaking, modifying: these are the keys to perfecting lessons. How will students be able to remember the difference between a participial phrase and an appositive phrase? How will they be able to decipher the words of Shakespeare? And, above all, why should they care about what he has to say? Many students don't, but most students do care about grades, so grades are used as a bargaining tool for teachers to extract work from their students. They care about passing, but we care about learning.

And I really do care, more than I expected I would. In the beginning, I had thoughts of inspiring even the most reluctant learners to try their best. Then, I realized that doing so is absolutely exhausting. But I still try. I hover, I cajole, I bargain, I call home, I plead, I threaten, and I use the grade as a tool. Why? Because my job is to get them to learn and I do my job to the best of my ability as often as I can.

Being an English teacher is like being a book. What they see everyday, that is the cover, but covers can be misleading. That's what we find out when we choose to become English teachers.

Learn more about this author, Linda Festa.
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