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The call came in the evening during the middle of August. My wife handed me the phone, it was our law firm's Chief Operating Officer. His message was short and to the point: the firm was downsizing; since I was the "new guy", I was the first to go; I would be paid until the end of the month; my health insurance was also paid to the end of the month and I could continue to buy it for 18 months; sorry it didn't work out; good night.

After telling him good night and hanging up the phone, I caught my breath and stared across the bedroom, suddenly adrift. I said a number of things I wouldn't have wanted anyone to hear. I went from numbness to white-hot anger and back to numbness. Eventually, I came out of the room. The kids were already in bed so it was just my wife and I.

My five year old son, Nathan, would be starting kindergarten in September; my three year old son, Patrick, would be starting nursery school around the same time; my youngest son, Henry, was four months old. We were all fortunate that my wife, Lynn, was able to be a full time mother.

I had "busted my hump" for the firm for about one and one-half years - long days at my office, night-meetings with local government boards, weekends at a satellite office. In my first month I had smilingly agreed to fill in for a senior partner at a night meeting scheduled for that evening. That day happened to be Lynn's birthday. A year later, when she was almost full term with Henry, increasingly immobile as a result, she already had two young and active boys to try manage. At the same time, my evening meeting schedule was increasing in its intensity. Still, most of our family's existence revolved around my job. The long hours and time away from Lynn and the boys was a sacrifice we willingly made. Simply put, we had every reason to believe it was our "big break." The salary was not the stuff of movie scripts, but we believed that with dedication, work, sweat, and a team attitude, it would all work out.

Prior to becoming an associate, I had completed law school at night while married and holding a career position in county government. Nathan had been born during law school, I tended to measure his early months by the deadlines at work and the deadlines for various professors at school. I didn't recall a lot from that time period.

Patrick was born a month before the bar exam. I had already left county government in order to study for the bar and I was unemployed when he was born. Six weeks premature, he had been colicky,

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