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CURL UP AND DYE FOR YOU

I've never done this before - not for anyone... let alone for a man ten years my junior who I've recently discovered I've fallen in love with.But here you are sitting expectantly in my bathroom,stripped to the waist with bath towels protecting your trousers and curlers and solution at the ready.

In Boots earlier today you'd decided to buy a home perm."You'll do it for me won't you?" you asked.

"Of course,"I replied but then a surge of apprehension shot through me as a worst possible case scenario flashed across my mind. You also bought a kit to dye your new beard black.

"Why the desired change in appearance?"I'd asked,"I like you just the way you are... have you murdered someone?"

You explained that you're growing the beard because you've applied for a job as a medieval tour guide and you may even get a job as an extra in a film if you can manage to stay on a horse for the duration of the battle. Out of work actors like you have to take every opportunity when it arises.

Your beard came through all ginger, these past few weeks and didn't match your hair.Funny that...I,a mere woman, never realised mens' beards could be a different colour from the hair on their heads.

"What colour are your pubes then?" I asked.

"Multicolour."

I fell about laughing. You're so funny. You said it so seriously too, making me believe you.

You went on to explain that you wanted a perm as longish, wavy hair would be more manageable than straight now it's down past your collar.

You'd look so dashing and romantic with long flowing locks dressed in medieval costume... my very own knight in shining Armour.

I'd never have thought I'd be doing this for you or guessed this would be how I'd get to see your broad shoulders and muscular build for the first time.I'm hardly turned on though - all my passionate feelings have temporarily gone out of the bathroom window replaced by the worrying thought that I'd mess up your hair.

Perceptive as ever you pick up on my anxious state.

"If it goes wrong, it doesn't matter... we'll just cut it all off."

I've seen you with short hair and you looked good then too.It's just that I get used to people looking a certain way.Dramatic changes are all too much for me especially if I'm the perpetrator.

You actors are used to altering your appearance more frequently than most people,but I Know you'd be vain whatever your guise. You can't even pass a shop window without casting a narcissistic glace at your own reflection.

I start doing the perm,reading the instructions at least three times.My hands are shaking as I mix the solution and I try not to pull the curlers too tightly."I know it's a bit of a cliche but I wouldn't hurt a hair on your head,"I whisper lovingly,

I decide I'm enjoying doing this - the physical closeness is great but I feel I've become closer to you in other ways too.Intimacies like these have a richness all of their own.

To my relief the perm is a success and you're pleased with the result so I go and make us a drink while you dye your beard.

What a mess you've made in my bathroom when I return! It's you who's the home hair-dyeing disaster... not me! And just when I thank you've finished, you decide the black beard doesn't look quite right with your new waves so you grab my Lady shave and dispense with it altogether.

When you go home the neighbours will reckon I've had two different men in one day (in addition to my estranged husband that is). But this is only a quiet village where nothing ever happens so I'm sure they'll be delighted to have something new to gossip about.

Learn more about this author, Stella Kaye.
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