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by E.M.Robinson

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Take time to get to know your children and they will get the message that they are valued. This will help the grow up with high self-esteem. Sometimes getting to know your children means dropping everything to listen to them when they are ready to talk. Other times, it means creating time to be together so that you can get to know each other.

Tell them you enjoy their company -
Make eye contact, smile, and try to relate to your child as an individual and not as an extension of yourself. Show him or her through your actions that time with them is time well spent. Did you have fun? Tell your child. Are you happy you chose this activity with your child over something else you could have been doing. Let your child know how you are glad you didn't miss this time together

Schedule Time -
The whole day can fly by without meaningful time together. If this is how you feel about your day, schedule time to be with your child. The greatest gift you can give your child is time with you.Finding out what is going on with your child so that you can be supportive of them during his or her school years is so important that you might even intentionally arrange times together rather than waiting for the occasion to arise on its own. If you have more than one child, find ways to have one-on-one time with each of your children individually. You will get information that you would never get otherwise.

Build your child's self-esteem by being supportive of him or her. Being supportive means:
1) trying to listen without making an immediate response.
2) being careful of how you sound so that you do not come off sounding judgmental.
3) asking specific questions based on what you do know about their lives rather than asking vague, general questions.
4) trying to relate to what they are saying without turning it into a lecture of how it was when you were that age.
5) being careful about your facial expressions and body language so that the nonverbal messages you send are not contrary to how you want to be.

Your children want to feel valued and this is a way to show them they are important to you. Make the most of this time with your child and don't let too much time go by before you spend time with them again. Take time to get to know your children and, in turn, provide the means for them to get to know you as well.

Learn more about this author, E.M.Robinson.

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