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The answer to this question depends on what is meant by being dependent on your partner. To some degree I am dependent on my partner. The same is true of other women although they would not like to admit it.

There are those who are so dependent on their partner that they have no identity of their own. As in the case of this woman who never worked. She got married shortly after graduating high school. Within a year she had a baby. From that time on, her entire life consisted of caring for the baby, the house cleaning, cooking and her husband's every whim. Soon there was another child and then a third. She did not write checks to pay bills. She seldom attended any social engagements, and only with her husband. There was an accident and her husband was gone. She was overwhelmed. She did not know what insurances they had or if he had a retirement plan. She had never written checks to pay any of the bills and therefore did not know what bills there were. She had never worked and had no training. She was totally dependent on her husband.

A women needs to have a sense of self-worth. She needs to know who she is previous to becoming seriously involved with a man. If she has her own identity, she will not become overly dependent on her partner.

I am dependent on my partner to a certain degree and feel there is nothing wrong with this. We take turns paying for dinner because we eat out quite a bit. He will wash dishes sometimes when I do not feel like it. We shop, pay bills, and do many other things together. When he makes a major decision he will talk to me about it and vice versa. When I decided to go back to school, I know he did not totally agree with it, but he supports me anyway.

I do depend on him to show me love and attention. When I am upset I look to him for comfort. Whenever he needs me I make myself available to him. I believe that when a man and woman get together it is because they want to be together. I do not believe in spending time with a man just to be with a man. My belief is that you only get to know a man with the intention of someday getting married. Therefore, I share everything with my partner and hope that he is doing the same. If this is considered as being dependent, then I do feel I should be dependent on my partner.

Learn more about this author, Connie Morrow.
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