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I am forged and shaped by life experience both good and bad. I am tempered by those same experiences and in some cases by my survival and by those who helped me and gave me faith. From infancy to adulthood, I have evolved and sometimes even de-evolved. From a less than peaceful childhood through volatile teen years, I became a person of violent emotions often turning these back on myself for lack of a better target. Finally, now at the ripe age of fifty I can say I know who I am with some degree of specificity. I can honestly look in the mirror when answering this question with a knowing smile and say I can define who I am today.

Throughout our lifetimes, we define ourselves based upon our surroundings, our needs, social standards, even the demands of others. As humans, we continuously learn and incorporate our learning's into our approach to life. New knowledge can't help but cause us to consider our assumptions to one degree or another. How we perceive the world around us will cause us to redefine ourselves if only to enable us to live comfortably within our current surroundings and circumstances. Like chameleons, human beings will do their best to blend into their social environment and avoid confrontation. Is that all there is though? Are humans simply creatures of avoidance and circumstance?

I know for me at least I sometimes feel that I have lived one thousand lifetimes in my fifty years on this earth. Some of those lifetimes were certainly due to circumstance outside of my direct control, others well they were choices I made even if I did not recognize it at the time. How do I differentiate between circumstantial and choice? It isn't always easy believe me there are times when taking those hard looks at myself it would be easier to turn away or blame others. Nevertheless, in searching my soul for the definitions of who I am it is necessary to be honest if with no one else at least with myself. So in all truthfulness here is how I define myself today.

I am first a woman of strength and character. With a strong sense of personal ethics that apply too both my personal and professional life, I often find myself at odds with those around me. I am a fighter, although it is easier often easier for me to fight for others than for myself.

I am a person who frequently doubts myself and my own abilities although I rarely show this face to the world.

I have a sly humor that shows an occasional mean streak. I know where it comes from and it is part of my defense against

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