Let me start by saying that I was a foster child for 6 months and was placed in a minimum of 4 foster homes. I was licensed as a foster parent by the age of 21 and I was licensed to take in four hard to place children. I believe the only way to tell if foster care is really for you is to do it. Let me clarify first, what it took me to get this license.

I had to be 21 years of age. That's it. There were no background checks and I know this personally because I was institutionalized at the age of 16 in a place for emotionally disturbed boys and girls. At age 17 , I was put in a psychiatric hospital until the age of 18. Had there been a background check, I do not believe I would have been licensed. There were no tests for me to take to qualify. Just be 21. I met that qualification.

It is very hard to have foster children and you need to know what you are doing. I was not fully equipped to do this job but I did it to the best of my ability and I loved these children, ages 1 , 13, 14 and 15. While I had never had children, I had a lot of background in knowing how to deal with a lot of these children's problems IE drugs, truancy , depression, suicidal etc.

I would have to say patience is the number one priority when it comes to having these children as they are going to test it to the core. The second priority is an open ear. These children had already been through the system, were kicked out of foster homes, kicked out of their own homes for that matter. The baby I had was hard to place because he cried non stop . Not in my house. I had so much love for this child and our number one favorite thing to do was pick flowers.

Empathy was so critical and vital to the success of foster parenting. I can't say enough about how important that was.

I had my trials through these 2 years, which is how long I was licensed. It was hard to let the children go but at this point in my life it was too much for me to take on, no matter how much I hated not having them. If you really care, you get attached and I did. I loved these children. I needed to let them go for my well being.

I know for the 2 years that I had these children, they were loved and treated equally. All had chores as well as dinner preparation to prepare them for the real world. We shopped together, we worked together and we cried together.

Besides having all of the qualifications that so many people seem to think you need to foster children, loving them is the key to how successful you will be. Everything else falls into place.

Learn more about this author, Screwloose.
Click here to send author comments or questions.

---

Add your voice

Know something about How to tell if foster care is really for you?
We want to hear your view. Write now!