4 of 9

Write now Article Tools

If you don't have sleep apnea, and haven't been around someone who has it, you don't understand how frightening it is to hear. Although I don't have sleep apnea, my first husband did-and still does, as far as I know. I do know it's a disease you can't "grow out of", and you can't be cured of it, either, as far as I have ever learned. So, once you have the disease, you will have it the rest of your life.

A doctor in Houston decided, a few years ago, that my present husband has sleep apnea. When I tried to correct him, he refused to listen, because he had made his mind up, and had already gone to the next question he wanted an answer to. So he reported that my husband has a disease that he DOESN'T have, just because he was unwilling to listen for a few seconds.

Sleep apnea affects the sleeper an entirely different way than the other diseases that can disturb sleep. In sleep apnea, the sleeper actually stops breathing, totally, for several seconds at a time. I used to lie beside my first husband and wait, counting off, to see how soon he would breathe again. Before he stopped, he would be snoring, and suddenly there would be total silence. When he took the next breath, he sounded a lot like a horse snorting, the intake of air was so violent. Sometimes he would stop breathing several times during the night; on very few nights did he sleep without stopping at least 1-5 times.

My present husband, on the other hand, never stops breathing, although he does stop snoring at times. However, I can still hear him breathing, because he begins taking short, quick, shallow breaths. When he has taken enough air into his lungs that way, he will suddenly start snoring again. When he first started doing this, I thought he was also suffering from sleep apnea, but when I listened closely, I could hear those short, quick, shallow breaths. Sometimes it takes several of them to get enough air; other times it only takes 3-5 of them. (I have counted up to ten of them, before he would relax and begin his usual snoring again!)

So not all snorers who stop snoring are experiencing sleep apnea. Some just stop snoring and begin breathing normally again, especially if they turn onto their side. Some will do as my present husband does, and take a lot of shallow, quick breaths. Others will just snore, and snore, and snore. But the danger for the person with sleep apnea is that he/she will not be able to make another breath. The flaps in the throat, that close the windpipe to keep fluid and food from going down it, will not come back up and let the sleeper breathe. In that case, the sleeper will die from lack of oxygen.

So if your partner stops breathing, and doesn't start again within a count of fifty, you might want to push him or her over on his/her side; that way, the breath should start back. And get him or her to a doctor! There are things that can be done to help the person with sleep apnea, but the best thing you can do is to make sure that he or she sees a doctor as soon as possible!

Learn more about this author, Barbara A. Black.
Click here to send this author comments or questions.

Add your voice

Know something about Sleep apnea?
We want to hear your view. Write now!