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Psychotherapist Nathaniel Branden tells the story of a woman whose family had agreed to clean up the kitchen before she made dinner. However, they rarely did, and, night after night, she had to clean up the kitchen before she started cooking. Finally, she became so resentful that she sought his help.

He gave her a simple answer. Instead of yelling and screaming, begging and pleading, hold them accountable for their actions. Start cooking when the kitchen is spotless, not before.

Three times, when the kitchen was not clean, she went into the living room and started reading a book. After that, the problem disappeared.

I [Dr. Branden] said to her, "If something doesn't work, don't keep doing it. Pay attention to outcomes. You needed to change your behavior to get them to change theirs. You gave them a strong reason to cooperate with you and do what they had promised to do. The moral of the story is: When you hit a wall, look for new actions to take."
"What I finally saw," she remarked, "is that if I was always willing to make up for their defaults, I wasn't really giving them any persuasive reason to change. When I gave them a reality that required that they do what they had agreed to do - surprise, surprise - their actions changed."'

Most simply put, accountability is the principle of cause and effect. What I do will affect the outcome. That's how nature works. If I chop wood for a fire, I will be able to keep warm. No fuel, no fire. There's nothing personal or emotional about it. It's just the way things are.

The principles of accountability are the key to successful businesses. If everyone knows what is expected, and what the consequences of unmet expectations are, things flow smoothly. If something is not working, the team works together to change it. In the best organizations, everyone shares a common vision and is personally engaged in making it happen. Successes are recognized and celebrated. Those who consistently fail to pull their weight are eliminated from the team.

The same principles keep society as a whole working well. If adults model responsible behavior, expect young people to do likewise, and consistently enforce those expectations, young people will consider accountability a normal part of life. Instead of being passive, self-pitying victims' who always blame someone else for their failures, they expect to carry their own weight, to take care of their responsibilities, and to honor their agreements.

Often, in an effort to be kind, we make things too easy for people. Rather than covering or making up for their mistakes or short-falls, we are better off to listen respectfully, empathize with their plight, and express our confidence in their ability to solve their problems. Accountability opens the door for ownership of one's own life and decisions. Ownership is the wellspring of individual purpose and meaning.

Accountability is the opposite of permissiveness. People are given the dignity of choice and of dealing with the consequences of their choices. When they become more responsible, they can have more freedom and make constructive use of it.

When society begins rewarding positive behavior instead of supporting negative behavior, a culture of self-discipline and accountability will follow.

For further development of these ideas, refer to the final chapter of Nathaniel Branden's book Taking Responsibility: Self-Reliance and the Accountable Life:
http://rous.redbarn.org/o bjectivism/Writing/NathanielBr anden/ACultureOfAccountability .html

Learn more about this author, Christine G..
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