"The Ugly Duckling" was one of my favorite fairy tales when I was growing up , and continues to be a poignant story for me as an adult. You see, I am the ugly duckling. I was labeled so at a very young age, and as prophecy would have it, I lived up to that image.

It has to do with an age-old question "If a tree falls in the forest and there is no one there to hear it, is there noise?" If the world had no mirrors, and I was looking at it, would I still be considered homely? If I was told I had no beauty, would I cease forever to be so?

If there were tall people in the world and I was short, would I still be considered short? After all, tallness and shortness is only a relativity. It has never bothered me, being petite and having tallness in my family. However, had I been born male, it probably would have had more impact and I surely would be suffering from "little man syndrome" constantly struggling with having to prove myself to be "big man on campus".

How does an ugly duckling feel? An ugly duckling goes through life feeling unworthy. An ugly duckling does not like other people staring at them because they feel others are revolted by their lack of beauty. They cannot speak and look people in the eye. Their ugliness filters into other aspects of their life, feeling unloved, unwanted and not belonging just like the duckling in the story.

Ugly ducklings go through life unsmiling. They are too sad inside. Low self-esteem, lack of self-confidence erodes any self-love and not smiling affects their outer beauty. When I was growing up, I used to watch those "go-go girls" dancing in their cages on television. I often wondered why I couldn't fit into a pair of tight pants like they could. Then I realized God had not endowed me with a wide pair of hips.

In the Western World, big asses are an asset, not to mention the big boob obsession. I am lucky to say, I have one of the above. From time to time I have thought of fat injection into my butt, or even padding; but then I would just look like the impersonator on "Big Mamma's House".

Living with physical imperfections all my life, I never focused much on what I wore. Because I was petite and had no hips or butt, I found myself in the children's section or the boy's section for clothes. I just found those clothes fit me better. My mother oftentimes had to fight with me to put on a dress. Even as an adult, I really have to fight with myself to wear a dress. I find them too frilly

• 1
• 2
• next page >>

---

Add your voice

Know something about Overcoming body image issues through self-acceptance?
We want to hear your view. Write now!