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How to start a conversation and make friends

It's surprising how many people are petrified at the thought of having to start a conversation. All they can think of is that point of social rejection which is always a possibility when attempting to begin some kind of dialogue. However, as we are all aware, these sort of skills are vital for you to get through life at both a personal and professional level so something needs to be done to conquer those innate fears.

How often do you stand in a crowd, a little worried that you don't know anyone, looking seemingly uninterested in even having a stab at having a bit of a chat? It isn't until somebody else approaches you that you can't shut up and unleash that person just waiting to explode with whimsical stories and outrageous anecdotes. Suddenly, you start finding some new friends! There are a number of things that you can do to start off a conversation so that it continues with its own momentum.

Probably the top reason for not being able to start a conversation is body language. If you stand in the corner with arms folded, head down and avoiding any sort of eye contact, it looks incredibly uninviting any potential conversationalists. Much body language is natural and sub-conscious but there are bits of it that are very controllable too. Before anything is even said, this is a fantastic chance to draw people in and make yourself look friendly even if you may well be a demonic, cold, son of the devil.

The most obvious body language to use when trying to talk to someone is a smile. By this I don't mean a bit cheesy grin to show off your yellow teeth but just a nice welcoming grin. Try to smile like you mean it as well, not with that awkwardness that can often come across as smug like the way your boss might smile at you if they saw you in the street. If the person responds, don't panic. Be confident and speak in an audible tone that doesn't come across as nervous. Furthermore, whatever you do don't sigh. You wanted to talk to them so even if they are boring just be tolerable until the conversation comes to an end.

When you start the conversation, it is vital that you start with an open ended question. How many times to you begin with How are you?' followed with a Fine' and then a prolonged awkward silence before you both walk your separate ways? This is because it is a dead question; it can be answered almost like a reflex response. The recipient doesn't even have to think about it. I'm not saying go up to someone and ask them what they think the meaning of life is


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