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Honesty is not simply important in the interaction between people; being honest to ourselves is essential for a successful, healthy life. When we deceive ourselves, we do ourselves an injustice, denying ourselves the chance to change things we may need to change in order to improve our lives.

Honesty is not only the best policy on a personal level, but also in politics, education and the media. We rightly expect the truth in these arenas; we expect it as a right. A government, a teacher or a journalist will not be successful if they are known to be dishonest. Mistakes are forgiven more easily than lies. When a person is known as dishonest, in any sense, they will never be seen as honest, in any capacity; they will never be trusted.

"Who lies for you will lie against you." ~ Bosnian Proverb

However, truth is subjective. Honesty often lies in individual perception and judgment; we may each hold our own 'truths' about something and they may be very different, sometimes even reconcilable. This is because honesty and truth, although essentially about facts and reliable figures, must go beyond these, at times. Even scientific 'truths' are proved false, as humans discover more about ourselves and the world we live in.

"The truth is more important than the facts." ~ Frank Lloyd Wright

Furthermore, although honesty is absolutely the best policy in a number of ways and for a number of reasons, there is a big difference between honesty that is requested and honesty that is foisted upon someone; there is a big difference between brutal and gentle honesty.

"People who are brutally honest get more satisfaction out of the brutality than out of the honesty." ~ Richard J. Needham

And there are times when things may be better left unsaid.

But dishonesty is never the best policy. We tell 'white lies' and convince ourselves we are doing the right thing, that we do it to prevent hurting someone, perhaps. But the truth is, when we tell someone what they want to hear, or what we think they would choose to hear, we do them no favours. Nothing is perfect in life, but things can be improved with honesty; problems can be worked out if we know what we are dealing with.

Learn more about this author, Dianne Murphy-Rodgers.
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