My mother used to say, "If I have to struggle, I'll struggle alone." Since my mother was a war widow, I also remember what she said when she learned that her beloved husband would never come home again. She said, "Lee, what am I going to do without you, Lee." I assume that she meant that she didn't know how she was going to make enough money to feed herself and raise two children alone.

My mother heard that someone was making money selling Christmas cards; and with the income property that my father left and the war widow's pension, Mom was able to feed us. I also remember getting hand-me-down clothes from a rich cousin. In addition to selling Christmas cards, Mom also branched out into selling advertising specialties.

When Jackie Kennedy became a widow with two children, it was easy for her to marry Aristotle Onassis and not worry about money. She didn't have to sell Christmas cards and advertising specialties. If Mom would have married someone who would have been unable to support a family, she would have lost the war widow's pension on top of it. As long as she remained a war widow, she had one guaranteed income; and of course, she didn't want anyone to marry her for her income property that she owned in partnership with her brother and sister-in-law.

Mom told me that there was one man that she would have married; but since he wasn't in a financial position to support a family, he went to Alaska on business to make some money. While he was in Alaska, his mother got sick in Chicago; and he went back home to help his mother. While he was in Chicago, he reconciled with his wife and never came back to us.

My mother didn't have any luck with men, and it seemed to me that love had something to do with money and security. Mom also used to say, "Nothing is wrong with me that money wouldn't cure." When Mom got sick, $10,000. had to come out of her estate to pay the doctors, but it didn't save her life. As it turned out, money didn't cure her.

Now I have a loving husband who says his health is more important than inheriting money from an impossible stepmother. In other words, she's the type of person who makes you feel like you can't do anything right. Getting money from her isn't worth the aggravation.

The moral of the story is that you can't buy three things. You can't buy love, you can't buy happiness, and you can't buy health. In other words, the best things in life are free; and you have to enjoy them while you can.

Learn more about this author, Carole Silverman.
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