by Sharon Lea Hill

Created on: March 03, 2008   Last Updated: June 29, 2009

Stress at certain times is actually a good thing - the "fight-or-flight" response to a dangerous situation is our body's way of protecting us from physical danger. There is also major stress over which we have little control (e.g., death, divorce) that affects us for long periods of time, and eventually we accept and release it. But, the stress that really harms us is the psychological stress we are all faced with every day called stressors - traffic jams, waiting lines, arguments, errands to run, medical problems, money problems; I could go on ad infinitum. It is this daily stress of everyday life that we find so difficult to cope with.

There are so many symptoms of stress that it is often confused with other illnesses, like depression or anxiety, and the following are just a few:

- Cognitive symptoms, such as the inability to concentrate or memory loss;
- Emotional symptoms, such as depression or short temper;
- Physical symptoms, such as weight loss/weight gain and skin breakouts; and
- Behavioral symptoms, such as sleeping too much/sleeping too little or procrastination.

Unfortunately, people with compulsive behavior may turn to drugs or alcohol to relieve the stress. The more stress we have, the harder it is for our body to calm down and our heart rate, blood pressure, and stress hormones remain elevated. With the worry of medical problems comes more stress, and the cycle continues. But, there are things you can do to thwart the onset of stress.

You've all heard the saying, "Don't sweat the small stuff." For many, that's easier said than done, but I find that the following works for me:

- If possible, remove yourself from the stressful situation and breathe. I know it sounds trite, but inhaling three deep breaths of fresh air and exhaling slowly does work.

- If you're in an argument, take a break. Walking away gives you time to calm down and focus objectively on the problem at hand.

- When confronted with a deadline, try not to look at the big picture; it can be overwhelming. Instead, prioritize everything into smaller, more manageable tasks.

Even though the small stuff is what drives us crazy and stresses us out, we do have some control. But there are times when stress is a result of something over which you have no control. For me, stress came as a result of caring for my husband during the last three months of his life. Ironically, the doctors said that stress may have caused his cancer. But, after one operation and follow-up chemotherapy and radiation, the cancer

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