by Gary Maclean

Created on: March 02, 2008   Last Updated: February 09, 2012

When I consider the question of an unfaithful spouse (the bad spouse), I like to look at things the "bad" spouse may say to implicate themselves. Through years of observation, personal experience and close iinvolvement with several intimate relationships, I have developed a list of twelve specific phrases the unfaithful spouse may use in one form or another. Many people get uneasy when they read my list of 12 phrases, so be careful. You may very well recognize some, or perhaps all, of them. I'm sorry, but these 12 phrases have been proven out in at least seven indpendent situations involving different people, so I have a high degree of faith in them.

I'll take a very brief look at the first six of these phrases. Check your situation to see if you recognize any of them. I will share my ideas using the masculine gender as the "bad" partner but I want to remind all of you that these thoughts hold equally as well when the woman is the "bad" partner, and, yes, the woman is often the bad one. My first "tell tale" phrase;

1) "The Unity Candle doesn't mean that, does it?"

"Therefore shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh." Genesis 2:24 The Bible KJV

A) The "leaving," (Therefore shall a man "leave" his father and mother,) i.e., the natural state of affairs, the reaching out of all men and women, the need to become an independent individual. The man leaves home to seek himself a bride.

B) The "cleaving," (and shall cleave onto his wife:) i.e., the legal act in which husband and wife make a public commitment of loyalty and lifelong devotion one to the other. Their vow to one another rises above all others; parents, siblings, friends and acquaintances. To "cleave" is to adhere firmly and closely or loyally and unwaveringly. "They will 'Share' their lives."

C) The "one flesh," (and they shall be one flesh.) i.e., the physical or sexual union which symbolizes the greatest intimacy of body and soul. They become "as one." This is the personal aspect of tender love and faithful responsibility which is permanent and binding.

This is your spouse's Awakening. You have just explained what the Unity Candle really means. You have become one, no more individuals, everything is for the union now. It simply astounds your partner. He is probably not cheating right now but this revelation has gotten him wondering. He thought it was just a pretty celebration. He just wasn't ready to be one with just one other anybody, just yet.

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