by Barb Hopkins

Created on: February 29, 2008

Trying to make a new friend can be intimidating, challenging and sometimes even a little scary. Should I walk up to a stranger and just say hello? Maybe I should ask the guy in the cubicle next to me if he'd like to grab a coffee? What if I went to that party alone and just starting talking to someone that looked interesting? At one time or another everyone has had questions similar to these cross their minds. Everyone wants to make friends but we're not always certain how to initiate that first contact.

"Friendship with oneself is all important because without it one cannot be friends with anyone else in the world." (Eleanor Roosevelt, Former First Lady)

Before you can go out and really begin the process of forming new friendships you must be a friend to yourself. Learn to like and love yourself. This is not always easy as most often we are our own worst enemy. Look in the mirror and tell yourself all the good things you offer the world. This may take some time, so plan accordingly. Be confident in the person you are and that confidence will draw others to you.

"To like and dislike the same things, that is indeed true friendship." (Sallust, Roman Historian)

Children play with other children that have similar interests. They do this naturally and without any adult interference. They form the closest friendships with the children that hold the same interests as themselves. As we mature, we tend to forget that the first way to make a new friend is to find a common ground.

Take a good look at your own personal interests and then look for others that share those interests. If you love to read, join a book club at the local library. Passionate about gourmet food? Take a specialty food class at a local college. A new mom might find a new friend a Mommy's Group. A car enthusiast could possibly find a friend or two in the nearest car club. Joining a service group like the Lions Club, Shriner's, or Moose may be perfect if you enjoy giving back to your community. If you suffer from shyness like so many people, committing to a club may seem too daunting. Try volunteering at your local hospital or outreach program. If you're not sure where to find these groups, check out the newspaper or internet. To start down the path for making a friend, you need to decide what you are passionate about and seek out others that share that passion.

"Be slow to fall into friendship; but when thou art in, continue firm and constant." (Socrates, Greek Philosopher)

Once you have decided where can

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