by Carrington M. Nye

Created on: February 29, 2008

It is a terrible habit of mine; using the word retard' when someone makes such an obvious mistake. Obviously I have never really known an actual retarded person, or to be PC a person whose intelligence is relatively slow in mental or emotional or even physical development.

Then one day I said the word in front of a co-worker of mine; I was using it in jest to someone who was being ever so witty while we were in the backroom opening a new shipment of freight. This co-worker was a fellow manager of mine and she paused what she was doing and kind of looked at me for just a moment. Later, I asked her if I had offended her in any way. I apologized just in case for my rudeness. She informed me then that she has a younger sister who is by definition retarded.

Guess who felt as small as an ant? You guessed it.

Now, she wasn't offended in the least as it turned out; I had just reminded her of her sister and she was momentary sad. She realized that what I had said was not a direct insult on the retarded community, that it was an insult on the guy who thought he was being witty. Tremendous relief flooded me and although I was saddened by the fact that this wonderful young woman and her parents had to struggle with a dearly loved family member, an adult who was forever mentally a child, she assured me that they weren't so sensitive about that fact and as a matter of fact, felt that society had gone too far with all of "that PC crap", "Its just the way she is; we love her for her and she is the sweetest girl you'll ever meet."

I got lucky that time, but I only use the term around my own family now people who, like me are comfortable enough with one another to say whatever they feel like without getting all huffy about certain remarks or comments. Thank God for that!

It was never an intention of mine to be belligerent to or insensitive of a certain group of people. Ignorance might have led me to use words that I might not have otherwise, but it's not as if I go out of my way to actually bully retarded people! Not the real ones. What kind of butt hole would that make me? I can answer that question myself: a pretty big one! I am not an abuser, I am simply me; funny, quirky, quick to laugh at a good story or joke and quick to take your hand if you need an ear. I am average, ordinary people and although I found myself wishing for a pretty big whole in the ground when I heard the story of my co-worker's sister, I never meant any harm.

I thanked my lucky stars that the person I was dealing with on that one occasion was a level-headed woman who had no animosity toward me and not some raving lunatic with an agenda to teach the world about the reality of the retarded community!

I do apologize if anyone has ever been offended by me; it was not intentional or meant to be harmful in any way. Nor is it for most of us humans!

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