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An affair, so glamorous
Flirtatious and exciting
Yet so lonely later on
When he leaves
At one o'clock in the morning.

My bed is empty and void
On the side where he laid
Just moments ago when he was here
Now it is cold and lonely
Just like the inside of my heart

Oh, I want to fall for him so much.
But I can't let myself do that
Passion isn't the same as love
I need to remember that

He wants no commitment, no attachment
Just fun for awhile
maybe some companionship too

While he is here
he says just the right words
Thank you for sharing yourself with me
You're so cute and so sweet
and small and young
He is older and supposedly wiser

So exiting, yet so lonely
He called today and wants to come and visit
He misses me a lot and can't wait to see me
My heart skips a beat.
Here we go again, but I can't say no.

"Yes I'll see you
What time?
Oh that will work great.
See you then
I miss you too," I say.
And then hang up the phone.

Once again, it's time to get ready
for his visit..make sure I look pretty
Oh, and sexy too.
The side of the bed he rests on
will be warm again or shall I say hot
That is the honest truth after all.

Who am I fooling?
Myself or my friend?
I am attached to him
His words and his passion
draw me in, as if there is no way out.
Is it a dream or real?

Every moment he is there is like a dream.
When he leaves, I say hello to reality.
Why doesn't he stay the night I wonder
Oh that's right
He finally told me he is seeing
more than one woman

And doesn't want to start trouble
With "any one of them."
I realize now that I am no longer
A commodity.
I am one of the MANY.
I guess that's the question
I forgot to ask.
I should have assumed I wasn't
the ONLY one.

They were others he was involved with
Maybe that is where he perfected his words
of passion
I wanted to believe I was the only one
Well, some nights I was.
I thought he couldn't stay away from ME

I fit into his schedule and into his arms.
And when I was with him that's all that mattered
The world was glorious then
It was only us and the moon and stars
And pure passion and pleasure

One day he told me he could do anything
With me
Because I was a wild woman
He couldn't do those things with others.
That was the last day I saw him.
I have more self esteem than that
and more respect for my body.
Why I didn't think of that sooner
I don't know.

No more convenience
Emptiness, heartbreak
No warm side of the bed
But no cold one later.
I wonder if he misses me.
I am the one he could do ANYTHING with.
It seems I was the naive one and the other
women had him figured out.

Learn more about this author, Kris Vaassen.
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