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Strategic Timeout

How about this one? The only way to gain control is to relinquish it. I have to be honest I tried it. It is extremely hard to learn but once you get past those first few steps, it comes almost naturally, much like catcher snagging a most perfect foul tip.

Let me explain. I always made sure that I prepared myself mentally for emotional situations that might arise. I would get tense and nervous almost always anticipating for what would was going to happen next. I was always thinking in the terms that action is the best and only policy and that through taking action I was gaining strength. But now after changing my ways, whoooie it is working like a charm. Now as with all elements in life that require change, sometimes seeing the results of the changes you have made takes time. Sometimes it may feel like hell is freezing over before you reap the rewards. And that is the toughest part. Making the decision, implementing the elements to bring about and support the required change and then waiting your ass off for the rewards. But when the rewards come, it is (with a slight giggle) completely empowering. I am going to give you my most recent example:

My best friend Gord, was pushing each and everyone of my buttons. He disagreed with everything I would say almost 90% of the time and then discredit me. Only to come back four days later to tell me it turned out I was right. It wasn't so much the questioning or the doubting of me as much as it was the way that I felt condescended upon. That topped with the fact that he is ALWAYS near the ex-from-heck and I hardly every see him anymore, (For nine years we have been inseparable) the hurt was a little overwhelming. But that hurt was not as much as my longing to just go over there and blow up in his face and paint a completely picture of exactly what he has said and done. Instead I tried to do things different. I did nothing; I walked away. When I bought shots there were two instead three. I stopped putting effort in. I stopped trying. I realized that I grew out of what I had before and now it was time to change. Gord needed to come to my level. He did. It took seven weeks. But every time he let me down. I ignored him, blew it off and threw it away. Last week the timing was right, he was putting more effort in and I gently expressed to Gord that I missed his friendship and that I of course still cared. We now are stronger than ever. And I don't feel the need to rely on this friendship. I am a big girl now.

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