"Home is where the heart is".

For those of us fortunate enough to be on the property ladder we have managed to invest ourselves in the bricks and mortar that is a "house". In many cases this house becomes an object, it is somewhere to live our life and spend time, but for me, these bricks form my "home".

Home making, and the recognition of your house as a home, is so much more than pride in your matching soft furnishings or the number of children that you populate it with. "Home" is a sensory thing, an emotion almost, and is a place where you naturally feel settled and "at one". This space to relax and recuperate in is so much more than a walled box as, to me, it means all of the following.

My home gives me a sense of belonging. It is the "base" for my life and the strong central point around which my life revolves. I cannot imagine going through life without this strong sense of "foundation" as it gives me the confidence and stability to carry out my job and my broader role in the community.

My home augments and clarifies my identity. I do not mean with the material possessions or decorations that it contains, but it shows me to be a settled character, with foundations and a strong sense of "family".

Home is sanctuary. It's a place that I can physically "escape" to in order to find peace and tranquility in a space that we have created. This tranquility is not always easily achieved with 4 boys under the age of 12 around, but the sense of calm does not really come from the volume in the home, it comes from knowing that I'm in "my" space.

Home is relaxation. It is the one real space in which I can be myself, unconditionally and without fear of criticism. No-one expects anything from me and I'm allowed to be myself. A true "home" is an environment without pressure or expectations, a very important place in today's hectic world.

My home means "love" to me. Obviously, my family share my home with me, and the feeling of love and warmth that brings is tremendous. A house can be filled with people that you are related to, but unless there is love and respect within that family, it can never be a home. There is a lot of expressed love in our home, and it makes it feel warm.

Home is safety and security. I enjoy living with the knowledge that I have invested in property and that this investment is reaping rewards, but it truly is my "castle" where I can protect my "people" and keep them safe.

Finally, "home" is my leisure time. We have many of our bonding moments in the house and it is always the place where we catch up and talk. However, it also becomes my hobby, when I can immerse myself in the various repair and improvement projects that need to be done, leaving me with a great sense of achievement and pride.

Whilst buying and establishing a house is a very legal and contractual process, establishing a home is an emotional one, with enormous rewards if you can successfully establish your "space".

Learn more about this author, Stephen Bate.
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