by Wendy Brock

Created on: February 25, 2008   Last Updated: October 31, 2008

My mother and I are very close. I have a deep admiration for her, but there is one characteristic about her that puts her above all other moms. Anyone who has ever met or known my mom, Mona McIntosh, knows she has an enduring commitment to her family.

In the past two years, my mom has been subjected to more hardships than a person should every go through in one lifetime. When her older brother's Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma returned, she was there for him everyday. Anytime he needed a ride to the V.A. hospital in Lexington, my mother took him. He was so sick the last couple of months he was alive. After he was permanently admitted to the hospital, mom stayed with him daily, making sure he got the care he needed. In his last couple of weeks, he couldn't speak, but my mom was there to be his voice.

His death was difficult for her. They were as close as a brother and sister could be. When we lost my uncle, my grandmother became very depressed. Granny became more dependent on my mother, who has always dropped everything to tend to her. Within six months, granny's grieving over my uncle led to a decline in her health. As her dementia worsened, she demanded to be put in a nursing home in Manchester, her hometown. Mom did it. She expected mom to frequently visit her. Mom did it.

When granny's medication was changed, her dementia subsided and she allowed us to move her to a nursing home in Richmond. Since she was closer to us, granny demanded that mom visit her everyday. Mom did. Then she demanded that mom visit all day. Mom did.

Whenever I've questioned mom why she's always done what granny asked, mom always gives me the same serious answer: "I always did what mama told me to." At first, I thought this was one of those parent gimmicks to try and get me to mind her. Through my mom's actions, I saw that she was telling the truth.

In granny's last weeks, mom never left her side. Anything granny wanted or needed, mom made sure she got it. Mom and I knew granny's time wasn't long and we tried to make the most of our last days together.

Granny's funeral was hard to deal with. I tried to be the stronghold for mom while I battled with breaking down emotionally. Mom and I somehow made it through with God's help.

The story isn't over yet. In between the losses of two of our favorite relatives, mom almost suffered another loss: mine. I was going through a high-risk pregnancy due to Lupus, and by doctor's orders, was induced at thirty-eight weeks. Mom was by my side the whole time in the delivery

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